1) at this time 2 weeks from now i will be on a cruise ship in the bahamas, soaking up the sun and the drinks, with no phone or email. ahhhhhh.
2) the roommate and i have hatched a plan to conduct an anthropology experiment of sorts. from now on when out at a bar, concert, etc. and talking to guys, we are going to speak with british accents and pretend we're from england. the ryan adams show on saturday should be a very interesting trial run...
Sep 25, 2007
Aug 16, 2007
distortion
walking through the lobby of the office building where i spent my day, i couldn't help but notice two kids, probably about 10 years old, standing by the elevators. each of them were turned sideways, looking over their shoulders at their reflections in the gold elevator doors. somewhat like what you see in mirrors at a fun house, their reflections were slightly wavy and elongated, giving both an appearance of being stretched unnaturally like taffy on a warm day. i barely gave them a second glance as i approached, until i overheard their conversation. it went something like this...
girl: "look how skinny we look in these doors!"
boy: "yeah, we look weird"
girl: "i almost look anorexic!"
boy: "um, what's 'anorexic'?"
girl: "duh. it's when girls don't eat so they can be skinny and get people to like them."
boy: "that's stupid. i wouldn't ever do that."
girl: "well, boys aren't anorexic, stupid. i wish i could have a mirror like this in my house. i look so skinny!"
i didn't know whether to go over to that little girl and smack her, hug her, yell at her or all three. when did kids get so body conscious and buy into the idea that people don't like you unless you're thin? what happened to the days of just playing with your friends and not worrying about how much you weighed or how skinny you looked? it made me really sad....and annoyed...and pissed off. that girl is just an eating disorder waiting to happen. the boy, on the other hand, didn't even know what anorexia meant, much less think he needed to starve himself to be liked.
when is our society going to accept people for who they are and not what size clothing they wear? yes, there is a responsibility to maintain a healthy weight, exercise and eat a balanced diet, but why should women feel the pressure to be morbidly thin when only 2% of the population have bodies like kate moss or angelina jolie? (granted, these two aren't the best examples, with kate's little coke habit and angie's pledge to avoid food because kids in africa are starving, but you know where i'm going here. )
i walked out the door shaking my head in disappointment and frustration. i wonder when that little girl will understand that it really is who you are as a person that either attracts or repels others, not the fact that you can go days without food or go home and throw up everything in your stomach. i hope she finds friends who are comfortable in their own skin and help her be the same with herself. i wish our media would stop congratulating skinny starlets with coke problems and eating disorders for shrinking before our very eyes. i'll look forward to the day when 10-year-old kids can focus on playing with their friends and having fun instead of worrying about body image and losing weight. unfortunately, i think those days are far, far away...
girl: "look how skinny we look in these doors!"
boy: "yeah, we look weird"
girl: "i almost look anorexic!"
boy: "um, what's 'anorexic'?"
girl: "duh. it's when girls don't eat so they can be skinny and get people to like them."
boy: "that's stupid. i wouldn't ever do that."
girl: "well, boys aren't anorexic, stupid. i wish i could have a mirror like this in my house. i look so skinny!"
i didn't know whether to go over to that little girl and smack her, hug her, yell at her or all three. when did kids get so body conscious and buy into the idea that people don't like you unless you're thin? what happened to the days of just playing with your friends and not worrying about how much you weighed or how skinny you looked? it made me really sad....and annoyed...and pissed off. that girl is just an eating disorder waiting to happen. the boy, on the other hand, didn't even know what anorexia meant, much less think he needed to starve himself to be liked.
when is our society going to accept people for who they are and not what size clothing they wear? yes, there is a responsibility to maintain a healthy weight, exercise and eat a balanced diet, but why should women feel the pressure to be morbidly thin when only 2% of the population have bodies like kate moss or angelina jolie? (granted, these two aren't the best examples, with kate's little coke habit and angie's pledge to avoid food because kids in africa are starving, but you know where i'm going here. )
i walked out the door shaking my head in disappointment and frustration. i wonder when that little girl will understand that it really is who you are as a person that either attracts or repels others, not the fact that you can go days without food or go home and throw up everything in your stomach. i hope she finds friends who are comfortable in their own skin and help her be the same with herself. i wish our media would stop congratulating skinny starlets with coke problems and eating disorders for shrinking before our very eyes. i'll look forward to the day when 10-year-old kids can focus on playing with their friends and having fun instead of worrying about body image and losing weight. unfortunately, i think those days are far, far away...
Jul 25, 2007
farewell dear focus
here is what my car looks like after being the unfortunate unit #2 in the 5-car collision i was in last week....
from the inside after both airbags deployed:
and from the back where the jackass not paying attention to rush hour traffic plowed into me, causing a chain reaction of subsequent accidents:
total damage: a whopping $6,775
the car is definitely totaled which makes me very sad. this has been a great little car; in fact she moved with me to chicago after my last car was totaled by some idiot not paying attention while driving. grrrrrrr. i'm going to miss her. *sniff, sniff* i'm actually dreading going to get my belongings out of the car tomorrow and then having to walk away, as if i'm abandoning an old pet that is to be put to sleep and out of its misery.
i will be wearing black and mourning tomorrow. should anyone want to send flowers, chocolates, or a handsome man to distract me from my sorrow, please feel free to do so.
rest in peace, little focus. no car will ever fit into a tiny spot on the chicago streets as well as you did.
Jul 17, 2007
how many licks does it take?
much like the tootsie roll commercial where the wise old owl asks how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop, i often wonder how many things it takes to make us truly happy. if the wise old owl doesn't know about his tootsie pop, then i sure as hell don't know the secret to the happiness of life.
but, really, when you're an adult and you are out on your own, working, looking for relationships, balancing friends and finances, and just trying in general to find things that make you happy or even content, what does it really take?
it seems to me that a lot of people i know right now are at some sort of crossroads. maybe they have the job, but don't like where they live. others have fantastic relationships but are miserable at work. some have the job, the mate and the house, but no close friends around to share in their happiness. as for myself, i love my job and am getting a promotion soon which will help me career-wise and financially, i have a great apartment and wonderful friends, my family is (pretty) sane and we get along great. so what's missing? the guy, of course. and why, oh why, does the lack of that special someone make such an impact on all of those other things that are necessary in the recipe for happiness? i know that i'm echoing a certain episode of "sex and the city" where carrie bradshaw ponders the same kinds of questions, but the questions have merit in the real world.
i guess i'm just musing aloud (or rather in type) about happiness and how it takes so many things to lead us there. why does it seem so unattainable or just beyond our reach? when will we be happy with just the job and the house or just the relationship or just having a family that isn't completely dysfunctional? can we ever come to a place in our lives where we put aside materialistic bullshit, ignore the norms of society and what seems to be expected in terms of financial, career, and relationship success and just be content with our lot in life? is it because we are all programmed to strive for more, to do more, be better in everything we take on? and when we do find ourselves in that perfect state of happiness, why does it always seem to be so fleeting? can we be happy in our own skin, in our current state without letting what's "missing" negate what we have?
5 million questions and no answers. i think i'd like to trade that wise old owl places. at least i could figure out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop and not how many licks it takes to make me give up on happiness.
but, really, when you're an adult and you are out on your own, working, looking for relationships, balancing friends and finances, and just trying in general to find things that make you happy or even content, what does it really take?
it seems to me that a lot of people i know right now are at some sort of crossroads. maybe they have the job, but don't like where they live. others have fantastic relationships but are miserable at work. some have the job, the mate and the house, but no close friends around to share in their happiness. as for myself, i love my job and am getting a promotion soon which will help me career-wise and financially, i have a great apartment and wonderful friends, my family is (pretty) sane and we get along great. so what's missing? the guy, of course. and why, oh why, does the lack of that special someone make such an impact on all of those other things that are necessary in the recipe for happiness? i know that i'm echoing a certain episode of "sex and the city" where carrie bradshaw ponders the same kinds of questions, but the questions have merit in the real world.
i guess i'm just musing aloud (or rather in type) about happiness and how it takes so many things to lead us there. why does it seem so unattainable or just beyond our reach? when will we be happy with just the job and the house or just the relationship or just having a family that isn't completely dysfunctional? can we ever come to a place in our lives where we put aside materialistic bullshit, ignore the norms of society and what seems to be expected in terms of financial, career, and relationship success and just be content with our lot in life? is it because we are all programmed to strive for more, to do more, be better in everything we take on? and when we do find ourselves in that perfect state of happiness, why does it always seem to be so fleeting? can we be happy in our own skin, in our current state without letting what's "missing" negate what we have?
5 million questions and no answers. i think i'd like to trade that wise old owl places. at least i could figure out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop and not how many licks it takes to make me give up on happiness.
Jul 13, 2007
the corrections
there is a book that sits on my shelf and mocks me every single time we make eye contact. it is perched there, always reminding me that i never made it past page 113 and have picked it up on occasion and then replaced it with the sigh that comes naturally with frustration and failure. this book is called "the corrections" and it has been somewhat the bane of my existence. i first picked this book up a few years ago after my sister finally trudged her way through it and flung it across the room in victory upon finishing the last word. and i started to read. and i started to hate this book. and i vowed that it would not get the best of me, that i would finish this damn prize-winning book even if it killed me.
i don't know what it was about the story that caused me such anguish. i think it was just the fact that it didn't grab my interest or intrigue me from the beginning. i remember not really wanting to read more about one of the characters because he was such a mess and it was like witnessing a trainwreck. and so at page 113, i called it quits, put it on the shelf for another day, another time.
that time has come. my dear friend gary and i have formed a support group of sorts because, you see, gary has had the same frustrating experience in trying to read this book as i have. so we have vowed to read it at the same time, discuss, yell, encourage and do whatever is necessary to finish this. it has become a personal goal for both of us. i even referred to finishing the corrections (rather self did that for me) in my very first blog post and so now i plan to mark it off the list of unfinished things in my life. it may seem minute, but those 557 pages will be conquered, once and for all.
i don't know what it was about the story that caused me such anguish. i think it was just the fact that it didn't grab my interest or intrigue me from the beginning. i remember not really wanting to read more about one of the characters because he was such a mess and it was like witnessing a trainwreck. and so at page 113, i called it quits, put it on the shelf for another day, another time.
that time has come. my dear friend gary and i have formed a support group of sorts because, you see, gary has had the same frustrating experience in trying to read this book as i have. so we have vowed to read it at the same time, discuss, yell, encourage and do whatever is necessary to finish this. it has become a personal goal for both of us. i even referred to finishing the corrections (rather self did that for me) in my very first blog post and so now i plan to mark it off the list of unfinished things in my life. it may seem minute, but those 557 pages will be conquered, once and for all.
Jul 11, 2007
singing praises
as we all know of the summer television schedule, it's full of re-runs, sub-par pilots and reality tv. so when i sat down last night to tune into nbc's new game show the singing bee, i wasn't really expecting a whole lot. joey fatone, previously of the boy band n sync and now known for his stint on dancing with the stars, hosting a game show where contestants hear part of a song and then have to sing the next line or phrase without missing, changing or adding a single word... i was a little unsure of how entertaining this would actually be.
to my surprise and delight, the show ended up being extremely entertaining and fun to watch. in fact, i'm pretty sure i'm already a singing bee addict. the roommate and i sat last night with the boys in 1R, drinking margaritas, watching the show, belting out the words to every single song that was played, yelling at the contestants who missed the easy ones and laughing our asses off.
the only bone i have to pick is the presence of scantily clad women in - not kidding - outfits designed to resemble the black and yellow markings of bees. yes, bees. and to make matters worse, they are referred to as "the honeybees." puke. they just kind of dance around and have no real purpose but to be eye candy for the male viewers around the country. they don't even have cases with money in them or showcases of prizes to display. but, i guess that's standard in the game show world. in truth, i blame bob barker.
that said, the singing bee is worth giving up half hour of your life every tuesday night. hell, i think i could rock as a contestant on that show. maybe i'll have to check into that...
to my surprise and delight, the show ended up being extremely entertaining and fun to watch. in fact, i'm pretty sure i'm already a singing bee addict. the roommate and i sat last night with the boys in 1R, drinking margaritas, watching the show, belting out the words to every single song that was played, yelling at the contestants who missed the easy ones and laughing our asses off.
the only bone i have to pick is the presence of scantily clad women in - not kidding - outfits designed to resemble the black and yellow markings of bees. yes, bees. and to make matters worse, they are referred to as "the honeybees." puke. they just kind of dance around and have no real purpose but to be eye candy for the male viewers around the country. they don't even have cases with money in them or showcases of prizes to display. but, i guess that's standard in the game show world. in truth, i blame bob barker.
that said, the singing bee is worth giving up half hour of your life every tuesday night. hell, i think i could rock as a contestant on that show. maybe i'll have to check into that...
Jul 6, 2007
Jul 5, 2007
to spark or to settle?
lately i've been mulling over the notion of settling when it comes to dating and relationships. not settling in the sense of "settling down" but the idea that when you're single and find yourself faced with a nice, attractive, fun person who is interested in you but with whom you don't really spark, is it "settling" to give the guy a chance and date him even without the crackling chemistry?
webster's defines the word "settle" as the following....
1 : to place so as to stay
2 a : to establish in residence b : to furnish with inhabitants :colonize
3 a : to cause to pack down b : to clarify by causing dregs or impurities to sink
4 : to make quiet or orderly
5 a : to fix or resolve conclusively b : to establish or secure permanently c : to conclude
6 : to arrange in a desired position
7 : to make or arrange for final disposition of
not necessarily the most helpful, that mr.webster. from the above definitions, i would assume that settling means a life of stability, permanence, repression, calm/boredom, contrived contentment, and finally death. and while some of these things such as stability, permanence, and even calm are quite positive traits to have in a relationship, there are so many things missing. from the definition above you certainly don't get any fun, excitement, change, variety, or surprises - the stuff new relationships are made of.
so what do we do? is it settling to date someone even if there's no spark? is finding a good, decent guy so difficult that we're trying to decide if we even need the spark? admittedly, the spark dies down after a while, but do we want to surrender ourselves to a relationship that doesn't even simmer? how important is the spark and is it better to just find a good guy and hang onto him, even if that means sacrificing the stomach-flipping, exhilarating, heart-stomping, electrifying attraction that we so rarely find, typically with the wrong person?
dating (or lack there of) blows.
webster's defines the word "settle" as the following....
1 : to place so as to stay
2 a : to establish in residence b : to furnish with inhabitants :colonize
3 a : to cause to pack down b : to clarify by causing dregs or impurities to sink
4 : to make quiet or orderly
5 a : to fix or resolve conclusively b : to establish or secure permanently c : to conclude
6 : to arrange in a desired position
7 : to make or arrange for final disposition of
not necessarily the most helpful, that mr.webster. from the above definitions, i would assume that settling means a life of stability, permanence, repression, calm/boredom, contrived contentment, and finally death. and while some of these things such as stability, permanence, and even calm are quite positive traits to have in a relationship, there are so many things missing. from the definition above you certainly don't get any fun, excitement, change, variety, or surprises - the stuff new relationships are made of.
so what do we do? is it settling to date someone even if there's no spark? is finding a good, decent guy so difficult that we're trying to decide if we even need the spark? admittedly, the spark dies down after a while, but do we want to surrender ourselves to a relationship that doesn't even simmer? how important is the spark and is it better to just find a good guy and hang onto him, even if that means sacrificing the stomach-flipping, exhilarating, heart-stomping, electrifying attraction that we so rarely find, typically with the wrong person?
dating (or lack there of) blows.
Jul 4, 2007
sweet land of liberty
in the spirit of my great country's independence day, i thought i would take a moment to reflect on some of the wise words carved into history by our fearless leader. let us all pay homage to W, eloquent master of the english language....
"This process has been drug out a long time, which says to me it's political." --George W. Bush, discussing the controversy surrounding Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez, Sofia, Bulgaria, June 11, 2007
"One of my concerns is that the health care not be as good as it can possibly be." --George W. Bush, on military benefits, Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007
"And there is distrust in Washington. I am surprised, frankly, at the amount of distrust that exists in this town. And I'm sorry it's the case, and I'll work hard to try to elevate it." --George W. Bush, interview on National Public Radio, Jan. 29, 2007
"I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?" --George W. Bush, asked if the tide was turning in Iraq, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006
President Bush: "Peter. Are you going to ask that question with shades on?"
Peter Wallsten of the Los Angeles Times: "I can take them off."
Bush: "I'm interested in the shade look, seriously."
Wallsten: "All right, I'll keep it, then."
Bush: "For the viewers, there's no sun."
Wallsten: "I guess it depends on your perspective."
Bush: "Touche."
--an exchange with legally blind reporter Peter Wallsten, to whom Bush later apologized, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006 (Watch video clip)
"Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die." --George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Dec. 7, 2006 (Watch video clip)
"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror." --George W. Bush, interview with CBS News' Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006
"Wow! Brazil is big." --George W. Bush, after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005
"Because he's hiding." --George W. Bush, responding to a reporter who asked why Osama bin Laden had not been caught, aboard Air Force One, Jan. 14, 2005
"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection -- an election in Iraq at this point in history?" --George W. Bush, at the white House, Washington, D.C., Jan. 10, 2005
"One of my concerns is that the health care not be as good as it can possibly be." --George W. Bush, on military benefits, Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007
"And there is distrust in Washington. I am surprised, frankly, at the amount of distrust that exists in this town. And I'm sorry it's the case, and I'll work hard to try to elevate it." --George W. Bush, interview on National Public Radio, Jan. 29, 2007
"I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?" --George W. Bush, asked if the tide was turning in Iraq, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006
President Bush: "Peter. Are you going to ask that question with shades on?"
Peter Wallsten of the Los Angeles Times: "I can take them off."
Bush: "I'm interested in the shade look, seriously."
Wallsten: "All right, I'll keep it, then."
Bush: "For the viewers, there's no sun."
Wallsten: "I guess it depends on your perspective."
Bush: "Touche."
--an exchange with legally blind reporter Peter Wallsten, to whom Bush later apologized, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006 (Watch video clip)
"Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die." --George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Dec. 7, 2006 (Watch video clip)
"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror." --George W. Bush, interview with CBS News' Katie Couric, Sept. 6, 2006
"Wow! Brazil is big." --George W. Bush, after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005
"Because he's hiding." --George W. Bush, responding to a reporter who asked why Osama bin Laden had not been caught, aboard Air Force One, Jan. 14, 2005
"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection -- an election in Iraq at this point in history?" --George W. Bush, at the white House, Washington, D.C., Jan. 10, 2005
and for more fourth of july fun, test your knowledge of our revered POTUS by taking the bush trivia quiz, challenge your ability to fill in the words of the president by completing the bushisms quiz or figure out your own political affiliation with the republican or democrat quiz. hours of good clean fun for the whole family! maybe we'll invite scooter libby over now that he won't be serving time in jail and we can get the low-down on how having a creepy vice president as a friend can save your ass.
so exactly how would mr. bush respond to my salute to him on this, our most patriotic holiday? i'm thinking something like this.....
HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY EVERYONE!! ENJOY THE HOLIDAY AND TRY NOT TO MAME YOURSELF ON ILLEGAL FIREWORKS. :)
Jul 2, 2007
accidentally fabulous
the summer has been a rush of plans, activities, events and friends so far. may flew by, june has come and gone and though i've had a great time staying busy, i was very much looking forward to this past weekend of having absolutely nothing to do. my biggest goal for the weekend was to go to the grocery store and perhaps do something that somewhat resembled physical activity. maybe.
so when the roommate initially proposed that we visit the taste of chicago for dinner on friday night, my first reaction was to wonder why in the hell 2 sane chicago residents would venture to the taste on opening night. however, the weather was gorgeous, i had no other plans and the list of participating restaurants and food vendors was too tempting, so hunger won out over common sense in the end. we headed to the taste and thoroughly enjoyed tapas portions of samosas, curry-spiced fries with chutney sauce, toasted ravioli, falafel, cheesy garlic bread, pound cake with fig vodka butter sauce drizzled with chocolate (i just drooled on my keyboard) and - just for you arrested development fans - frozen chocolate covered bananas. (10 cents, however, does NOT get you nuts) all in all the food was great. i won't even go into a description of our fellow taste attendees - that would have to be another post of its own. suffice it to say, i will never be returning to the taste of chicago again, but i am glad that i went once to sample lots of yummy goodness. the end of the night consisted of a movie and a bottle of wine, which was exactly what i needed after stuffing myself silly.
having no set plans on saturday, i slept very late, had lunch outside at one of my favorite neighborhood places, played tennis, went to the grocery and had a fabulous healthy dinner. later that night i went out with friends and we simply sat outside, had a few beers and just enjoyed good conversation and the nice weather. after the friends left, roommate and i headed across the street to the irish pub where we had a couple more beers, met a romanian guy who gave us a grueling geography lesson and bought us a round, and finally got kicked out by the bouncer when the bar was closing. we stumbled home and i don't even remember my head hitting the pillow.
sunday dawned sunny and warm and begged everyone in the city to come out and play. i obliged, going with the roommate to the beach and lying in the sand, soaking up some sun, and dozing to the new ryan adams cd on my ipod. it's been a long time since i felt sand between my toes and relaxed to the backdrop of vivid blue water. having worked up quite an appetite with all of our outdoor activity, we abandoned the beach in search of mexican food, outside seating and some margaritas. we found what we were looking for in logan square and a pitcher of margaritas later we were spontaneously on our way to the pontiac for honky tonk bingo. very few things compare to sitting outside, drinking beer, and listening to a vulgar man with a thick country accent call bingo numbers and give away shitastic prizes like rubber chickens, cardboard airplanes, hot wheels, and crayons. amanda was one of the lucky winners - she got a 1000 piece puzzle and you better believe we'll break that bad boy out one of these nights. honky tonk bingo night would not have been complete without some country music and fulton county line gave us our fill. after a couple beers and several rounds of bingo, we decided to be responsible and call it quits. driving back toward our apartment, we approached a certain bar which, for reasons that need not be discussed or rehashed, has been dubbed "the gates of hell." as luck would have it, there was a parking space right outside and it was as if amanda's car parked itself and chucked us out in the direction of the bar. once inside we chatted with the bartender and ended up having drinks and doing a couple of shots with him and his friend. finally after midnight we payed our tab and headed to the nastiest of nasty - the taco bell.
tucking in after 1 am with my belly full and my head fuzzy, i had to smile about the weekend. it was stress-free, fun, and everything just fell into place from the weather to the bars to the random people we encountered. it's the kind of weekend you just can't plan for and you don't want to end. muy bien!
so when the roommate initially proposed that we visit the taste of chicago for dinner on friday night, my first reaction was to wonder why in the hell 2 sane chicago residents would venture to the taste on opening night. however, the weather was gorgeous, i had no other plans and the list of participating restaurants and food vendors was too tempting, so hunger won out over common sense in the end. we headed to the taste and thoroughly enjoyed tapas portions of samosas, curry-spiced fries with chutney sauce, toasted ravioli, falafel, cheesy garlic bread, pound cake with fig vodka butter sauce drizzled with chocolate (i just drooled on my keyboard) and - just for you arrested development fans - frozen chocolate covered bananas. (10 cents, however, does NOT get you nuts) all in all the food was great. i won't even go into a description of our fellow taste attendees - that would have to be another post of its own. suffice it to say, i will never be returning to the taste of chicago again, but i am glad that i went once to sample lots of yummy goodness. the end of the night consisted of a movie and a bottle of wine, which was exactly what i needed after stuffing myself silly.
having no set plans on saturday, i slept very late, had lunch outside at one of my favorite neighborhood places, played tennis, went to the grocery and had a fabulous healthy dinner. later that night i went out with friends and we simply sat outside, had a few beers and just enjoyed good conversation and the nice weather. after the friends left, roommate and i headed across the street to the irish pub where we had a couple more beers, met a romanian guy who gave us a grueling geography lesson and bought us a round, and finally got kicked out by the bouncer when the bar was closing. we stumbled home and i don't even remember my head hitting the pillow.
sunday dawned sunny and warm and begged everyone in the city to come out and play. i obliged, going with the roommate to the beach and lying in the sand, soaking up some sun, and dozing to the new ryan adams cd on my ipod. it's been a long time since i felt sand between my toes and relaxed to the backdrop of vivid blue water. having worked up quite an appetite with all of our outdoor activity, we abandoned the beach in search of mexican food, outside seating and some margaritas. we found what we were looking for in logan square and a pitcher of margaritas later we were spontaneously on our way to the pontiac for honky tonk bingo. very few things compare to sitting outside, drinking beer, and listening to a vulgar man with a thick country accent call bingo numbers and give away shitastic prizes like rubber chickens, cardboard airplanes, hot wheels, and crayons. amanda was one of the lucky winners - she got a 1000 piece puzzle and you better believe we'll break that bad boy out one of these nights. honky tonk bingo night would not have been complete without some country music and fulton county line gave us our fill. after a couple beers and several rounds of bingo, we decided to be responsible and call it quits. driving back toward our apartment, we approached a certain bar which, for reasons that need not be discussed or rehashed, has been dubbed "the gates of hell." as luck would have it, there was a parking space right outside and it was as if amanda's car parked itself and chucked us out in the direction of the bar. once inside we chatted with the bartender and ended up having drinks and doing a couple of shots with him and his friend. finally after midnight we payed our tab and headed to the nastiest of nasty - the taco bell.
tucking in after 1 am with my belly full and my head fuzzy, i had to smile about the weekend. it was stress-free, fun, and everything just fell into place from the weather to the bars to the random people we encountered. it's the kind of weekend you just can't plan for and you don't want to end. muy bien!
Jun 28, 2007
in absentia
i realize that i've been quite absent from the blogging world as of late. mostly due to having nothing of note to blog about, i've logged on, stared at the blank screen, started to write about yet another bout of road rage, too much drinking, my lack of motivation to work out, or the inevitable encounter with some chavvy guy, and then stopped and figured my poor internet readers had heard it all before....and again....and yet again....
so really i'm just checking in to say hi, i'm alive, completely sober and still single. in lieu of blogging, here are some things i *have* been doing lately.....
entertained my sister and niece (as you all know)
spent a fabulous weekend at my old stomping grounds in bloomington for jill & nick's nuptuals
went on the chicago architecture tour
and of course, celebrated pride weekend with my favorite moes
i also went to mayfest, took in a cubs game with annie, reported for jury duty, reconnected with my friend stephanie, rearranged our apartment, got to spend time with casi who escaped briefly from the land of potatoes, went for farewell drinks for a colleague, became unnaturally addicted to the british series "hollyoaks", got some very positive news about work, spent lots of time in 1R with my new fabulous neighbors, did some shopping, ate a lot, drank a lot and am now vowing to dust off that gym membership card and attempt to work off some of the fun i've had the past 6 weeks.
so please forgive my lack of blogging. i'm back, less busy and will surely be able to regale you with stories of bird poop, hangovers, idiot men and random encounters of the andrea kind. stay tuned.
Jun 6, 2007
VP of WHAT?
as i sat in the waiting area of the cook county courthouse yesterday awaiting my number to be called for the jury selection process, my fellow jurors and i were treated to the day's episode of the view. after one particular segment in which i thought for sure kathy griffin and baa baa waa waa were going to duke it out, the show went to a commercial break.
your typical, run-of-the mill feminine maxi pad commercial rolled and for the next 30 seconds my poor, bored-to-the-state-of-mush brain began to wonder who designs maxi pads. and more importantly, what is their job title? some examples i thought were fitting.....
Jane Doe, Senior VP of Leakage Prevention
John Doe, (right - as if these things are designed by a man, but i'm an equal opportunity smart ass)
Lead Project Manager, Protection Division
J. Doe, Sanitary Needs Director
J. Doe, Head Engineer, Pad Design Team
J. Doe, Absorption Specialist
i know, i know. why would i spend any amount of time actually thinking of these things?? i'll tell you why - because that's how much waiting for jury duty sucks. still, i'd love to meet someone who works for tampax or kotex or one of the other feminine hygiene companies and take a gander at their business card. i guess it's better than other jobs, though. like being a spooge mopper at a strip club. ew.
your typical, run-of-the mill feminine maxi pad commercial rolled and for the next 30 seconds my poor, bored-to-the-state-of-mush brain began to wonder who designs maxi pads. and more importantly, what is their job title? some examples i thought were fitting.....
Jane Doe, Senior VP of Leakage Prevention
John Doe, (right - as if these things are designed by a man, but i'm an equal opportunity smart ass)
Lead Project Manager, Protection Division
J. Doe, Sanitary Needs Director
J. Doe, Head Engineer, Pad Design Team
J. Doe, Absorption Specialist
i know, i know. why would i spend any amount of time actually thinking of these things?? i'll tell you why - because that's how much waiting for jury duty sucks. still, i'd love to meet someone who works for tampax or kotex or one of the other feminine hygiene companies and take a gander at their business card. i guess it's better than other jobs, though. like being a spooge mopper at a strip club. ew.
May 22, 2007
May 10, 2007
home again, home again, jiggidy jig!
i am so excited, i can barely contain myself. in a few short days, my sister and niece will arrive from london for a very impromptu, spur-of-the-moment 2 week visit! i'll be cleaning and shopping and baby-proofing all weekend in preparation for their stay with me. though, by the look of her sweet little face, you wouldn't think that she'd get into anything, right?? a perfect little angel if you ask me!
yeah, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight................
this is more like it:
i cannot wait to have her here running around, bringing to my apartment the sweet chaos that only her adorable self could make me look forward to. it'll be fantastic to see my sis, too, of course and to take them out and let them really enjoy all that my fabulous city has to offer.
i wonder if i can hold them hostage and make them and my brother-in-law move back here for good....
Apr 25, 2007
fun with conference calls
things i do while on conference calls:
- file my nails
- pay bills
- check email
- send text messages
- make grocery/target lists
- make to do lists
- work on other projects
- play snood
- eat
- stay silent when asked a question (they'll think they lost me somehow)
- instant message
- shop online
- draw on my notes
- organize my office
- spin in my chair
- pretend i have a bad connection and hang up early
- make faces at colleagues
- blog
hey, you gotta pass the time somehow. you can tell i'm on a call right now, can't you?
- file my nails
- pay bills
- check email
- send text messages
- make grocery/target lists
- make to do lists
- work on other projects
- play snood
- eat
- stay silent when asked a question (they'll think they lost me somehow)
- instant message
- shop online
- draw on my notes
- organize my office
- spin in my chair
- pretend i have a bad connection and hang up early
- make faces at colleagues
- blog
hey, you gotta pass the time somehow. you can tell i'm on a call right now, can't you?
Apr 22, 2007
it's flip cup time in the city
this weekend marked an unofficial holiday for all of us adults who like to revel once a year in the behavior of college days past. as april 21 neared, we dusted off the plastic cups, assumed our fighting stances at our tables and practiced the one sip, one flip method that would lead only one team to flip cup victory. saturday dawned warm and sunny - a perfect day for drinking - nay, chugging - beer. people across the chicago area pulled on festive t-shirts promoting team names like "cirrhosis not fibrosis", "chug, set, flip", "mother fuckin' booze time", "team banana hammock", "pink tacos", "what the flip?", "e=mc hammered", "team dick in a box", "flippin' sexy beer monsters" and many, many more. we flocked to the bar, slapped on the wristbands and waited anxiously for the tournament to begin. some drank ahead of time, some huddled and talked strategy, some lined up at the tables and practiced their last minute flipping skills. and suddenly it was 2:30 - teams had been checked in, the schedule of play posted, beer poured, and players flanked the tables, ready to flip to their hearts' content. the event was a huge success and everyone (that one stupid complaining idiot bitch so does not count) had a great time and we raised over $3000 for the cystic fibrosis foundation.
sadly, my team didn't even make it out of pool play, but we were able to cheer on our friends who made it to the final. even better than the event itself was something that happened later. post flip cup, several of us wandered over to another bar to sit outside, drink more and enjoy the gorgeous weather. at one point in the evening, annie, aka flip cup organizer extraordinaire, called her nephew ryan who has CF and has been the inspiration for this event, now in it's third year. he thanked her for what she was doing and everyone at the table was in tears. as much as we all have fun talking smack, coming up with crazy team names, and getting completely wasted mid-day, this reminded us all of the real reason behind the event. we're flippin for a cure.
thanks, annie, for all of your hard work again this year. we had a fantastic time! and if anyone has a doubt about that, see pics below.....
Apr 18, 2007
why, gap, why??
i had one of the single most annoying shopping experiences of my life today. i left work a little early and decided on a whim to stop into the gap to get myself a new pair of jeans. typically i absolutely hate shopping for jeans - they're always too long, too big in the waist, too tight on my butt, etc. - but the roommate just recently found some really cute ones at gap, so i decided to take my chances there.
i wandered to the back of the store where an entire wall is devoted to jeans. low-rise, boot cut, boyfriend, curvy, short, extra long, dark, distressed, faded.... you name it, there was a shade and style of denim to fit it. unfortunately there wasn't a pair that would fit ME. i started sifting through the pristinely folded pants and immediately noticed a pattern. all of the jeans seemed to come only in sizes 0, 2, and 4, many of which were also long lengths. i started rummaging with a fury, convinced that the gap wouldn't betray me like this and only carry jeans that fit tall stick figures (think 6 foot praying mantis in gap denim). after unearthing one size 8 and one size 10 (both in horrific shades of stonewash that didn't even look like they belonged with all of those dark, tiny jeans) i gave in to the truth. there were only little people sizes at the gap. i stepped back from the shelves crammed with all of those jeans and sighed. i thought briefly that i had inadvertantly wandered into the children's section. nope. regular womens section it was. shaking my head in disappointment, i felt my excitement for shopping deflate like a balloon. turning my back on the traitorous denim wall, i hung my head and walked dejectedly out of the store, not even noticing or caring anymore about the massive sale going on or the cute ballet flats i was eyeing when i first arrived.
did i think about asking the sales people if they had normal girl sizes? yeah, for about 2 seconds and then that scene from pretty woman where the snotty sales women won't help julia roberts flashed through my mind. it could have gone something like this....
me: um, excuse me. do you have any of these jeans in bigger sizes?
gap twiglet: (blank stare) um, why?
me: because right now in order to wear any of those jeans, i would have to buy two pairs and sew them together.
gap twiglet: (with look of disdain) i don't think we have anything in your size. marcus! do you think we have anything in her size?
gap mo: (sashaying over from where he was folding tank tops, gives a once over, frowns, folds arms) oh honey, no. we only like our clothes to be seen on tiny people. lane bryant is right across the hall.
me: fuck you.
it just wouldn't have been pretty. maybe i'll give a different location a chance, but i'm pretty sure i'll never venture into that particular store again. the last thing a girl needs when she's trying to find a pair of jeans that fits well and makes her ass look great is to be mocked by 100 pairs of jeans that can be worn only by roughly 5% of the female population. come on gap. i'd love to fall into your jeans, i just don't want to have to give myself an eating disorder to do so.
i wandered to the back of the store where an entire wall is devoted to jeans. low-rise, boot cut, boyfriend, curvy, short, extra long, dark, distressed, faded.... you name it, there was a shade and style of denim to fit it. unfortunately there wasn't a pair that would fit ME. i started sifting through the pristinely folded pants and immediately noticed a pattern. all of the jeans seemed to come only in sizes 0, 2, and 4, many of which were also long lengths. i started rummaging with a fury, convinced that the gap wouldn't betray me like this and only carry jeans that fit tall stick figures (think 6 foot praying mantis in gap denim). after unearthing one size 8 and one size 10 (both in horrific shades of stonewash that didn't even look like they belonged with all of those dark, tiny jeans) i gave in to the truth. there were only little people sizes at the gap. i stepped back from the shelves crammed with all of those jeans and sighed. i thought briefly that i had inadvertantly wandered into the children's section. nope. regular womens section it was. shaking my head in disappointment, i felt my excitement for shopping deflate like a balloon. turning my back on the traitorous denim wall, i hung my head and walked dejectedly out of the store, not even noticing or caring anymore about the massive sale going on or the cute ballet flats i was eyeing when i first arrived.
did i think about asking the sales people if they had normal girl sizes? yeah, for about 2 seconds and then that scene from pretty woman where the snotty sales women won't help julia roberts flashed through my mind. it could have gone something like this....
me: um, excuse me. do you have any of these jeans in bigger sizes?
gap twiglet: (blank stare) um, why?
me: because right now in order to wear any of those jeans, i would have to buy two pairs and sew them together.
gap twiglet: (with look of disdain) i don't think we have anything in your size. marcus! do you think we have anything in her size?
gap mo: (sashaying over from where he was folding tank tops, gives a once over, frowns, folds arms) oh honey, no. we only like our clothes to be seen on tiny people. lane bryant is right across the hall.
me: fuck you.
it just wouldn't have been pretty. maybe i'll give a different location a chance, but i'm pretty sure i'll never venture into that particular store again. the last thing a girl needs when she's trying to find a pair of jeans that fits well and makes her ass look great is to be mocked by 100 pairs of jeans that can be worn only by roughly 5% of the female population. come on gap. i'd love to fall into your jeans, i just don't want to have to give myself an eating disorder to do so.
Apr 16, 2007
the tax man cometh
wooo hoooo!! 11:16pm on april 16 and i have finished my taxes - an entire 24 hours and 44 minutes before the actual deadline this year, i might add. just for fun, another comic from explosm.net. oh how i love them.
rest in peace
this is an actual plaque mounted on a bench somewhere in the south bank area of london. nice to know i'm not the only one mourning the much desired, yet deceased notion of finding a good guy...
Apr 8, 2007
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