i've been fighting allergies and asthma my whole life. i've been on countless medications, tried allergy injections, endured wheezing, sneezing and swollen eyes in order to hang out in a place where my allergies were aggravated, and have shown up at the emergency room so short of breath i could barely carry my keys because the extra weight was almost too much to bear more times than i care to remember. my allergies and the asthma attacks they trigger have kept me from attending parties, staying overnight at friends' houses, going to work functions at someone's home, and dating guys who have pets to which i am allergic. i've missed days of school and work, have had to book hotel rooms when visiting friends i would normally stay with except for the fact that they have pets, and have had to be very careful when booking vacation rentals to make sure i'm not staying in a "pet-friendly" room that may have had a dog in it before i arrived. my friends tease me that i need to live in a bubble, which, to some degree, i've felt in reality now and then. it's not fun to be the person who is left out or who has to sit in a hard wooden chair in a room without carpet while everyone else is in the living room, lounging on sofas and carpeted areas that hold dander. even then, there's a good chance i'll be miserable and will have to leave early. it's frustrating and annoying with the worst part being that this is something that will never change for me.
so why am i going into ridiculous detail about how miserable my allergies and asthma have made me over the years? because people don't get it. people who do not have severe allergies and/or asthma and have never seen a friend or loved one in the midst of an asthma attack so bad that their doctor actually says that person has NO BREATH SOUNDS (yes, this was what my doctor told me once), they don't get it. that's not to say that people don't try to be sympathetic. i hear things all the time like, "isn't there medication for that?" "can't you take a shot?" "yeah, i get a stuffy nose, too, when i'm around animals" "we'll only stay for a little while and you can tell me when you need to leave", etc. but i still don't think everyone truly understands and that's ok. at least they try to be nice about it. the people who really piss me off are those who dismiss allergies as not real, something that we make up because we don't like animals, or that we're being overly dramatic. i'm really sick of hearing from these people who can let their pet lay on their face and not have any sort of physical reaction tell me that i'm lying about the severity of my allergies.
this is the preface for what i'm about to say. i do not want to sit next to your pet on an airplane. does that mean i hate your pet or animals in general? no, of course not. if given the choice of sitting next to an animal that may urinate, poop, or yap for the duration of a flight, i would guess most people would choose to sit elsewhere just as a matter of their own comfort. i know most people would also choose not to sit next to a small child if given the option, but at least a child can have a diaper change and has a parent who can talk rationally to him or her in an effort to keep them calm and entertained. not that i'm comparing children to animals, but a lot of people seem to see them in the same category in travel situations.
still, the reason i don't want your pet next to me on a flight is not because of the potential noise or smell, it's because i'm allergic to it. i don't care if it is in a carrier and has to stay there for the entire length of the flight, per FAA regulations. your dog makes me physically ill and there is nothing i can do about it. sure, there's a chance that if the dog stays in the carrier under the seat, the likelihood of my allergies being affected is lower, but that doesn't mean i should have to take that risk. just because you want your pooch to go on vacation with you does not mean those of us with allergies should suffer. now that the airline industry is jumping on board with the option for cabin pets (and let's be honest, the revenue they can generate for allowing people to turn their pets into carry-on luggage), those of us with allergies are going to have to deal with more issues than the non-allergic passenger.
i looked at several airline websites before writing this, in hopes that i would find a clear policy as to their stance on how passenger allergy issues are addressed when there are pets on a flight. i could not find that information on any of the sites i checked. there's plenty of information about the type of carrier you can have, that the animals have to be "harmless, inoffensive and odorless" - right, good luck trying to get your pet to control its "odors" - how to get through security with a carry-on pet, etc. there was NO mention of how passengers with allergies should go about securing a seat away from someone traveling with a pet. there were no guidelines as to how to deal with a seating issue if the person next to you sits down with their pup in tow. there was nothing to state who gets preferential treatment - the person or the animal. i'm sure the crew members are given a more extensive outline of how to deal with these situations, but as a passenger i would like to know ahead of time so that i don't create a scene when i have to ask that the person next to me be re-seated because their dog could give me an asthma attack. i don't want to have to see the annoyed eye-rolls or the frustrated glares that i will most likely get when i have to come clean and admit that i have a legitimate health problem that could very easily be exacerbated by the animal flying near me. i think these policies need to be published and those traveling with pets should have to reveiw them before flying so that there are no surprises when i politely ask the flight attendant to re-seat fluffy and her human to somewhere besides my row. the sad truth is, i would most likely be the one who would be asked to move. sorry, but i'm not giving up my window seat because i'm next to someone with a pet and i have no qualms about making that known. if it's an upgrade to first class, however, we can talk.
there is one exception that i am absolutely happy to make - service animals. those traveling with service animals clearly need their assistance and i would never make a big deal over that. in that case, i would be glad to have the crew re-seat me. as one with a medical condition, i have to travel with medications; some people have to travel with service animals. it's just the way it goes.
i'm not an animal hater. in fact, if i could get a dog, i'd love to have one. but i can't and being around one in a confined space such as an airplane will do nothing but put my health at risk. reading about the changes that a certain airline has made recently to not only allow pets but use this as a marketing tool led me to a plethora of comments about the issue. some people sided with those of us who have allergies, stating:
"Sorry to hear that [airline name omitted] has no regard for those with allergies. There is no way for someone to escape allergens inside a small cabin. To add to that, if there is any severe reaction they would have a real difficulty on their hands. I am greatly disappointed"
"That is totally unfair to people who are allergice to cats, dogs, etc. If you wind up sitting next to the person with the pet then you can have a horrible allergic reaction while you are up in the air. Then what is [the airline] going to do? They should rethink this idea of allowing pets in the cabin with the passengers."
"How sad that airlines are so money hungry. There is no way that they considered people with allergies. Make no mistake, all allergy medicines will not be salvation to a person having an attack. I've been there. The airlines won't realize the error of their ways until either a person has a catastrophic attack and become hospitalized or God-forbid, dies from the pet allergy. Then, a lawsuit will be in order. Make no beans about, I've got just one time to experience a bad attack, and I won't hestitate to visit my lawyer! Can we say lawsuit?"
and then there are the ones who would rather travel with their pets in the cabin of the plane than stop to consider what that might do to the comfort and health of others:
"Anyone who is severely allergic to pets should always have their medications with them. The NIH says that Allergens are carried on clothes, among other things. So just sitting next to a pet owner on a plane or going to a restaurant can cause an allergy sufferer to have problems. If you know you are very allergic, take precautions. Bring your medicine, wear a mask. Most of us have our medical issues to deal with and be glad yours aren't worse."
hmmm.... am i glad that i have allergies instead of cancer? of course. will wearing a mask or taking medicine help me? nope. is being severely allergic to the point where i could have an asthma attack in an airlplane where there would not be the appropriate medical treatment not a bad enough medical condition for you? no? thanks for being so understanding. asshole.
"The air in most all aircraft is cyled out with clean outside air about every two minutes, so you who complain about allergies need to stop complaining about something that most likely won't even bother you."
i'm guessing the person who posted this little gem of knowledge is a physician and expert on allergies and asthma. thanks for clearing that up for all of us. moron.
"I think this is better than people that insit on flying with annoying litle children. As afar as people with allergies are concerned, don;'t that have medication for those things?"
first of all, you should really spell check before you post a comment like that because you already sound stupid enough by what you're saying. secondly, children are PEOPLE and while it can sometimes be frustrating to be on a flight with a crying child, think of how frustrated the parents are while they are trying to calm the child down and avoid the evil stares from those around them. and last i checked, children do not actually pose a health threat. thirdly, there are medications for allergies?!! really?!! wow!! that must mean there's a magic pill that cures allergies that none of my doctors have known about for the last 30 years. amazing that you seem to know it all. fucking idiot.
i could go on and on, but this diatribe has already gotten out of control and my soapbox is starting to bow under the weight of this argument. so let me just leave you with this - be nice to people with allergies. it is not a fake medical condition and can cause truly severe health issues in many cases. we are just as frustrated by our allergies as those around us are by us having to make a big deal of them. and if you must fly with your pet, please be respectful if someone sitting near you asks to be moved or requests you be re-seated. it's not personal, it's just the allergies talking.
Nov 5, 2009
Nov 4, 2009
weirdo wednesday
i've had an exhausting couple of days, so i'm going totally cheat on my blog post today. (doesn't bode well when i'm taking shortcuts on day 3, which should really be day 4, does it?) so until i can come back tomorrow rested and refreshed and ready to write (i have mad alliteration skills, by the way), here are some snippets of weird news that made me go hmmmm.....
you know you hate your job if you do what this guy did:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_work_excuse_stabbing
and you certainly should not have children if you think this is ok:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_child_in_box
and you should probably try not to get arrested for drunk driving while dressed like this:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_breathalyzer_halloween;_ylt=Ak5__aESReD8P2siNWQ4Xi7tiBIF;_ylu=X3oDMTJ1c29xbnZsBGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMDkxMTA0L3VzX29kZF9icmVhdGhhbHl6ZXJfaGFsbG93ZWVuBGNwb3MDMQRwb3MDMgRzZWMDeW5fdG9wX3N0b3J5BHNsawNwb2xpY2VicmVhdGg
it's comforting to know that as often as i do dumb things or act before i think, i've never been as big an idiot as these morons.
back tomorrow with something insightful and thought-provoking. i promise.
you know you hate your job if you do what this guy did:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_work_excuse_stabbing
and you certainly should not have children if you think this is ok:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_child_in_box
and you should probably try not to get arrested for drunk driving while dressed like this:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091104/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_breathalyzer_halloween;_ylt=Ak5__aESReD8P2siNWQ4Xi7tiBIF;_ylu=X3oDMTJ1c29xbnZsBGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMDkxMTA0L3VzX29kZF9icmVhdGhhbHl6ZXJfaGFsbG93ZWVuBGNwb3MDMQRwb3MDMgRzZWMDeW5fdG9wX3N0b3J5BHNsawNwb2xpY2VicmVhdGg
it's comforting to know that as often as i do dumb things or act before i think, i've never been as big an idiot as these morons.
back tomorrow with something insightful and thought-provoking. i promise.
Nov 3, 2009
give me the books boys and free my soul
i had a very bad day today. a VERY bad day. granted, it could have been much worse. no one that i love was in an accident, died or got diagnosed with cancer. but i still had a bad day and though i'm not physically affected, my emotions and tension level were through the roof by about noon today. needing some time without a ringing phone, email or project deadlines looming, i went to a nearby bookstore for some much needed solace.
walking into the store i immediately felt a slight sense of relief. i wandered through each area, trying to forget for a little while the issues that had been causing me so much tension and frustration all morning. i wound through the shelves, running my fingers along the spines of books that held stories of people's lives, of mysteries and thrillers, of tragic love stories and historical accounts of days gone by. i thumbed through art and architecture books letting the colors, lines and shapes soak into my mind. i imagined what it would be like to visit every place in the travel section and learn every language for which there was a study guide. i looked at the cheery kids books, thinking of how my niece and nephew would tear through them (somewhat literally) if they were there. i looked wistfully at holiday stories new and old, reminding myself that in a few short weeks i would be with my sister and her family in london where my stressors couldn't reach me unless i let them.
after a good part of an hour had flown by, i selected a book to purchase, ordered a cup of coffee and took a little extra time to sit quietly in the cafe and relax. i reflected on my mood after an hour among the books and realized that while i was still frustrated and stressed, i was much better. for me there is something truly calming about wandering through a bookstore, looking at the titles and holding the books in my hands. the weight of the books help center me somehow and yet the stories inside hold a promise of forgetting, of immersing myself in a different world if only for a little while.
thank you, books, and i look forward to our next therapy session.
walking into the store i immediately felt a slight sense of relief. i wandered through each area, trying to forget for a little while the issues that had been causing me so much tension and frustration all morning. i wound through the shelves, running my fingers along the spines of books that held stories of people's lives, of mysteries and thrillers, of tragic love stories and historical accounts of days gone by. i thumbed through art and architecture books letting the colors, lines and shapes soak into my mind. i imagined what it would be like to visit every place in the travel section and learn every language for which there was a study guide. i looked at the cheery kids books, thinking of how my niece and nephew would tear through them (somewhat literally) if they were there. i looked wistfully at holiday stories new and old, reminding myself that in a few short weeks i would be with my sister and her family in london where my stressors couldn't reach me unless i let them.
after a good part of an hour had flown by, i selected a book to purchase, ordered a cup of coffee and took a little extra time to sit quietly in the cafe and relax. i reflected on my mood after an hour among the books and realized that while i was still frustrated and stressed, i was much better. for me there is something truly calming about wandering through a bookstore, looking at the titles and holding the books in my hands. the weight of the books help center me somehow and yet the stories inside hold a promise of forgetting, of immersing myself in a different world if only for a little while.
thank you, books, and i look forward to our next therapy session.
Nov 2, 2009
NaBloPoMo Me ASAP
me: adam thinks we should do NaBloPoMo
self: do you HEAR the eyes rolling back in our head??
me: oh ye of little faith
self: sorry to burst your blogging bubble, but have you looked at the calendar? it's november 2. this month of crazy psychotic blogging began yesterday, a day when there was nothing but crickets from our blog
me: i know, i know. i just didn't think about it because, well....
self: say it. because you were at the bar drinking beer and doing shots in the middle of the day while watching football and you couldn't be bothered to think about anything else besides cocktails and the colts.
me: wow, self, have you been to rehab when i wasn't looking?
self: i'm just saying, we - and by we i mean you - don't have the best track record on following through, especially when there's no consequences for quitting and you are the only one to keep yourself motivated. don't drag me down with you and your procrastinating ways this time!
me: just for that we're doing it. so there. better get the creative juices flowing, self, because you've been disappointing in the witty writing category lately.
self: maybe if you'd drag yourself away from desperate housewives, glee, private practice, mad men and all of those other people you've been paying attention to, you would have heard me screaming with ideas.
me: ok, fine. less tv, more blogging. but you better come through for me. don't make us look like a collective idiot this month when people will actually be expecting posts daily.
self: you do a fine job of making us look like an idiot all on your own.
me: why do i keep you around?
self: because of my razor sharp wit and charming personality?
me: more like the meds don't work very well....
self: enough. it's time for blogging. good luck and godspeed.
me: ditto.
(note by author - i fully apologize for the potentially craptastic posts that may be headed your way throughout the month of november. please bear with me....er...us)
self: do you HEAR the eyes rolling back in our head??
me: oh ye of little faith
self: sorry to burst your blogging bubble, but have you looked at the calendar? it's november 2. this month of crazy psychotic blogging began yesterday, a day when there was nothing but crickets from our blog
me: i know, i know. i just didn't think about it because, well....
self: say it. because you were at the bar drinking beer and doing shots in the middle of the day while watching football and you couldn't be bothered to think about anything else besides cocktails and the colts.
me: wow, self, have you been to rehab when i wasn't looking?
self: i'm just saying, we - and by we i mean you - don't have the best track record on following through, especially when there's no consequences for quitting and you are the only one to keep yourself motivated. don't drag me down with you and your procrastinating ways this time!
me: just for that we're doing it. so there. better get the creative juices flowing, self, because you've been disappointing in the witty writing category lately.
self: maybe if you'd drag yourself away from desperate housewives, glee, private practice, mad men and all of those other people you've been paying attention to, you would have heard me screaming with ideas.
me: ok, fine. less tv, more blogging. but you better come through for me. don't make us look like a collective idiot this month when people will actually be expecting posts daily.
self: you do a fine job of making us look like an idiot all on your own.
me: why do i keep you around?
self: because of my razor sharp wit and charming personality?
me: more like the meds don't work very well....
self: enough. it's time for blogging. good luck and godspeed.
me: ditto.
(note by author - i fully apologize for the potentially craptastic posts that may be headed your way throughout the month of november. please bear with me....er...us)
Oct 16, 2009
commander of contempt
This ran in USA Today on Thursday, October 15: (particularly offensive points bolded by me)
I truly hope that this is not, as Mr. Hutcheson states, the "typical commander's assessment" of gays in the military. I was going to write about how closed-minded, disrespectful, bigoted and disgusting I find Mr. Hutcheson, but I think my friend Adam covered this so well over at his blog that I am linking to his post here. I couldn't have said it better myself.NO GAYS IN MILITARY
As a retired Air Force pilot with combat experience during
the Persian Gulf War, let me provide your readers with a typical commander's
assessment of the "don't ask, don't tell" policy: We should have never had it in
the first place. Discrimination against those who desire to serve in the armed
forces is not only historic, it's also essential. Putting together an effective
fighting force is the responsibility of civilian and military commanders,
whether in the field, the Pentagon or the White House. National military police,
which I helped to craft, should enhance commanders' functions, not hamstring
them. I had enough problems with sleeping arrangements for women on my aircrew, let alone gay men. I should not have to worry about room assignments, who's bunking with whom, who is offended by the gay soldier or airman, or whether he's angry because no one will talk to him. I am a father to my daughter, not to men
in combat. These issues, and many others that social experiments create, stand
squarely in the way of developing an effective fighting force. America, the U.S.
armed forces to exist to protect you and your way of life, not to appease the
desires of those on the fringe of society.Keith Hutcheson - Athens, Ga.
Oct 9, 2009
take me home, country roads
i realized this morning as i was taking a shower that i was unconsciously humming a song. (i don't belt out songs in the shower for fear of scaring my roommates and making them think the sound of my singing is actually a small animal trapped somewhere in the vents of the apartment, screaming for help)
i stopped and realized that the song i had stuck in my head was "take me home, country roads" by john denver. it may sound strange to those of you reading this (if there is still anyone out there who checks my blog), but it is actually very appropriate for today, and this weekend in general. you see, today several of my family members - mom, dad, aunts, uncles and grandmother - left on a caravan to west virginia where my grandfather's ashes will be put to rest. originally hailing from west virginia, grandad is now returning to his true home, the home where he met my grandmother, fell in love and began the life that brought them so much happiness together. grandad may be gone, but he will live on in spirit in all of us. the country roads have indeed taken him home and we are all lucky to have been along for his journey.
Almost heaven, west virginia
Blue ridge mountains
Shenandoah river
Life is old there
Older than the trees
Younger than the mountains
Growin like a breeze
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
All my memories gathered round her
Miners lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky
Misty taste of moonshine
Teardrops in my eye
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
I hear her voice
In the mornin hour she calls me
The radio reminds me of my home far away
And drivin down the road I get a feelin
That I should have been home yesterday, yesterday
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
Take me home, now country roads
Take me home, now country roads
i stopped and realized that the song i had stuck in my head was "take me home, country roads" by john denver. it may sound strange to those of you reading this (if there is still anyone out there who checks my blog), but it is actually very appropriate for today, and this weekend in general. you see, today several of my family members - mom, dad, aunts, uncles and grandmother - left on a caravan to west virginia where my grandfather's ashes will be put to rest. originally hailing from west virginia, grandad is now returning to his true home, the home where he met my grandmother, fell in love and began the life that brought them so much happiness together. grandad may be gone, but he will live on in spirit in all of us. the country roads have indeed taken him home and we are all lucky to have been along for his journey.
Almost heaven, west virginia
Blue ridge mountains
Shenandoah river
Life is old there
Older than the trees
Younger than the mountains
Growin like a breeze
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
All my memories gathered round her
Miners lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky
Misty taste of moonshine
Teardrops in my eye
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
I hear her voice
In the mornin hour she calls me
The radio reminds me of my home far away
And drivin down the road I get a feelin
That I should have been home yesterday, yesterday
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
Take me home, now country roads
Take me home, now country roads
Jun 15, 2009
first confession
for some reason, i got to thinking about the catholic sacrament of reconciliation (maybe that's a sign that i've done something bad and need to be asking forgiveness from someone) and my own experience with it. i started my education in catholic school where, as some of you may know, you go through certain ceremonies (a.k.a. sacraments) at an early age. a few months after going through the traumatic process of being born and forced into a loud, bright, strange world of oogling people, you are taken to a church where an old guy in a robe says lots of things you don't understand and then pours cold water on your head, causing you to scream and flail, which is only made more frustrating by the layers of white lacey communion gown shrouding your entire being. everyone smiles at you as you sit there trapped, scared, crying and you wonder what is wrong with all of these people watching the old guy try to drown you without even bothering to help. eventually everyone goes back to your parents' house for cake and you probably receive gifts, most of which have no practical application for you as they tend to be savings bonds and items for your future rather than a nice teething ring or baby einstein video. baptism - check.
usually somewhere in the realm of 1st - 3rd grade you are again presented with the sacraments. and here you thought being held against your will and doused with water was the worst of it. wrong. the next two events in your catholic upbringing are first reconciliation and first communion. now, i really have no complaints about the communion thing because i remember my own quite fondly. i got a rockin' white dress, very grown up dress shoes and lots of photo opps. all i had to do was show up looking fabulous, eat a piece of dried out bread, take a sip of wine and smile nicely for pictures. oh, and eat cake and open gifts at the after party. hello - not a bad way to spend a sunday!
but let's regress. before first communion, you complete your first confession, or reconciliation, as a way to purify your soul and learn how to ask for forgiveness from god. i'll be honest - the thought of going into a confessional and confiding everything i'd done wrong, regardless of whether i'd been caught doing it, freaked me out a little. not sure if the old guy in the robe would give me a penance, i was sort of convinced that i'd burn in hell, so i started to worry. the weeks leading up to my first confession were nerve-wracking and anxiety-filled. by the time the big day came i was thinking i might tell him my sins and, instead of telling me i could be forgiven - with the correct number of incantations of the "hail mary" and "our father", of course - he would shake his head behind the screen, press a button and a trap door would open under me and send me directly to satan himself.
we were herded in like sheep and directed to sit silently and pray while we waited for our turns. one-by-one we were called in and once you finished with your confession, you were sent straight to another area to kneel and conduct your penance. this left everyone waiting on pins and needles, straining to see what each classmate looked like when they came out. would there be tears? would some be sent straight to the prinicpal's office? would there be calls to parents to inform them of just how bad their children were? we were told that our sins were just between us and the priest, and of course jesus, god and everyone in heaven, but that no other living being would be told anything and no one would get in trouble. yeah, right. we knew better than to fold with that flimsy reassurance. still, we had the fear in us from weeks of preparation and the fire and brimstone of what god does to sinners who don't confess, so we were all there to come clean, like it or not.
my turn came and i walked to the confessional, my sweaty little hands fumbling with the door. i knelt and faced the screen, the lines and prayer i needed to say scrawled on a notecard, just in case i got stage fright and forgot. i began as i had been told to - "bless me father for i have sinned. this is my...(pause for effect and deep breath)...first confession." after that, poor father got an earful. i spouted off a laundry list of sins, some true, most not. you see, i was worried after comparing notes with my friends that maybe i didn't have enough sins so i started making things up. i didn't want god to be disappointed or think that i was hiding anything so it was no holds barred - forget the fact that lying to a priest, and in effect god, is probably a worse sin that hitting my sister or being sassy to my parents.
nevertheless, i wrapped it up and let out a gargantuan sigh, awaiting my fate. the priest went through his canned response and finished up with a prayer. i was holding my breath in anticipation and was finally given my sentence. for absolution and forgiveness i simply needed to say several sets of two prayers. i scrambled out of the confessional and joined a few of my classmates, already kneeling and softly chanting their given number of repetitions. we quickly compared our respecive punshments and decided to race to see who could get finished with each prayer, each time it was said, the fastest. it was certainly more interesting that way and we were going to be forgiven, no matter how quickly we finished up, right? i figured god would appreciate our speed since there were 20 of us filling his ear that day.
i don't know how many times i've actually been to confession since then. maybe a handful of times, if that. since i've been old enough to better understand reconciliation as a catholic sacrament, i've thought about that first confession with wry amusement. the hand wringing, the bad dreams, the list of alleged sins.... everything that went into preparing for a day when all i knew was that maybe i wasn't bad enough and saying x number of prayers would wipe my slate clean. i can only imagine what the priest felt, getting up that day, looking at his calendar and seeing that he had to hear the confessions of 20 little snots. i wonder if he made bets with the nuns about how many times he'd hear "i talked back to my parents" or "i hit my brother." i really hope that he took a big ol' chalice of that alter wine in with him and at least had a few cocktails while absolving the second grade class of our heinous sins.
usually somewhere in the realm of 1st - 3rd grade you are again presented with the sacraments. and here you thought being held against your will and doused with water was the worst of it. wrong. the next two events in your catholic upbringing are first reconciliation and first communion. now, i really have no complaints about the communion thing because i remember my own quite fondly. i got a rockin' white dress, very grown up dress shoes and lots of photo opps. all i had to do was show up looking fabulous, eat a piece of dried out bread, take a sip of wine and smile nicely for pictures. oh, and eat cake and open gifts at the after party. hello - not a bad way to spend a sunday!
but let's regress. before first communion, you complete your first confession, or reconciliation, as a way to purify your soul and learn how to ask for forgiveness from god. i'll be honest - the thought of going into a confessional and confiding everything i'd done wrong, regardless of whether i'd been caught doing it, freaked me out a little. not sure if the old guy in the robe would give me a penance, i was sort of convinced that i'd burn in hell, so i started to worry. the weeks leading up to my first confession were nerve-wracking and anxiety-filled. by the time the big day came i was thinking i might tell him my sins and, instead of telling me i could be forgiven - with the correct number of incantations of the "hail mary" and "our father", of course - he would shake his head behind the screen, press a button and a trap door would open under me and send me directly to satan himself.
we were herded in like sheep and directed to sit silently and pray while we waited for our turns. one-by-one we were called in and once you finished with your confession, you were sent straight to another area to kneel and conduct your penance. this left everyone waiting on pins and needles, straining to see what each classmate looked like when they came out. would there be tears? would some be sent straight to the prinicpal's office? would there be calls to parents to inform them of just how bad their children were? we were told that our sins were just between us and the priest, and of course jesus, god and everyone in heaven, but that no other living being would be told anything and no one would get in trouble. yeah, right. we knew better than to fold with that flimsy reassurance. still, we had the fear in us from weeks of preparation and the fire and brimstone of what god does to sinners who don't confess, so we were all there to come clean, like it or not.
my turn came and i walked to the confessional, my sweaty little hands fumbling with the door. i knelt and faced the screen, the lines and prayer i needed to say scrawled on a notecard, just in case i got stage fright and forgot. i began as i had been told to - "bless me father for i have sinned. this is my...(pause for effect and deep breath)...first confession." after that, poor father got an earful. i spouted off a laundry list of sins, some true, most not. you see, i was worried after comparing notes with my friends that maybe i didn't have enough sins so i started making things up. i didn't want god to be disappointed or think that i was hiding anything so it was no holds barred - forget the fact that lying to a priest, and in effect god, is probably a worse sin that hitting my sister or being sassy to my parents.
nevertheless, i wrapped it up and let out a gargantuan sigh, awaiting my fate. the priest went through his canned response and finished up with a prayer. i was holding my breath in anticipation and was finally given my sentence. for absolution and forgiveness i simply needed to say several sets of two prayers. i scrambled out of the confessional and joined a few of my classmates, already kneeling and softly chanting their given number of repetitions. we quickly compared our respecive punshments and decided to race to see who could get finished with each prayer, each time it was said, the fastest. it was certainly more interesting that way and we were going to be forgiven, no matter how quickly we finished up, right? i figured god would appreciate our speed since there were 20 of us filling his ear that day.
i don't know how many times i've actually been to confession since then. maybe a handful of times, if that. since i've been old enough to better understand reconciliation as a catholic sacrament, i've thought about that first confession with wry amusement. the hand wringing, the bad dreams, the list of alleged sins.... everything that went into preparing for a day when all i knew was that maybe i wasn't bad enough and saying x number of prayers would wipe my slate clean. i can only imagine what the priest felt, getting up that day, looking at his calendar and seeing that he had to hear the confessions of 20 little snots. i wonder if he made bets with the nuns about how many times he'd hear "i talked back to my parents" or "i hit my brother." i really hope that he took a big ol' chalice of that alter wine in with him and at least had a few cocktails while absolving the second grade class of our heinous sins.
May 7, 2009
memememememememememememe......
was tagged for this by adam, so here it is. if you don't feel like reading, at least check the bottom of the post to see if you've been tagged. :)
1. What are your current obsessions? sangria, the possibility of learning spanish via rosetta stone, things to do when my sister and family are here next month
2. Which item from your wardrobe do you wear most often? grey hoodie and black running pants. comfort is key!
3. Last dream you had? oh dear... my dreams are crazy all the time, but last night's consisted of vampires floating in a pool of water where i was stuck on a little raft, but then i blew a whistle and i was transported to a hallway with a very tall man who walked me into a room full of my colleagues waiting for me to present, but i had forgotten my shoes and was worried about being barefoot, so i ran out to the parking lot only to find it was flooded and i had to make my way to the train station through the water but there was no train, only a bus full of people who didn't speak english and wouldn't give me any shoes but then i was trapped on the bus with them and we were in some city in the mountains so i jumped off the bus and started running.... i don't think i need to go on. this is how i dream ALL the time. it's exhausting.
4. Last thing you bought? a 6" subway sammie
5. What are you listening to? my roommate watching tonight's episode of survivor
6. If you were a god/goddess who would you be? probably eris, the goddess of discord and chaos
7. Favourite holiday spots? london, st. croix, napa
8. Reading right now? just finished "the namesake" and getting ready to start "roma". still trying to finish "the corrections" - going on 7 years now....
9. Four words to describe yourself sarcastic, easy-going, friendly, realistic
10. Guilty pleasure? back-to-back episodes of old school 90210 on the weekends
11. Who or what makes you laugh until you’re weak? my niece
12. Favourite spring thing to do? it's a tie - tennis and/or sitting outside on the deck with friends, cooking out and having drinks
13. When you die, what would you like people to say about you at your funeral? "damn, that woman made a killer cocktail"
14. Best thing you ate or drank lately? mexican fiesta with the roommates on cinco de mayo
15. When did you last go for a night out? in munich at the hofbrauhaus last weekend
16. Where is the next place you'd like to travel? Italy!
17. Care to share some wisdom? expect nothing and you will rarely be disappointed
18. Song you can’t get out of your head? beyonce - "single ladies"
19. Thing you are looking forward to? my sister and family coming to chicago in june!!!!! i cannot explain how excited i am for this!!!!!!
20. Which disease or condition would you most like to see eradicated? i'm torn between cancer and alzheimer's because both have brought a lot of sadness to my family
21. What is your most irrational fear? falling down and breaking my teeth. weird, i know.
22. what irritates you on a regular basis? people who can't drive!!!
23. What is the most important lesson you've learned from someone in your life? to treat everyone fairly and not judge others - from my ma-maw who displayed this every single day
Rules of the game. Respond and rework. Answer questions on your own blog. Replace one question. Add one question. Tag 6 people.
ready, set, meme! gretchen, lyn, amanda, rachel, colleen (i know that's only 5, but that's all i have to tag!)
1. What are your current obsessions? sangria, the possibility of learning spanish via rosetta stone, things to do when my sister and family are here next month
2. Which item from your wardrobe do you wear most often? grey hoodie and black running pants. comfort is key!
3. Last dream you had? oh dear... my dreams are crazy all the time, but last night's consisted of vampires floating in a pool of water where i was stuck on a little raft, but then i blew a whistle and i was transported to a hallway with a very tall man who walked me into a room full of my colleagues waiting for me to present, but i had forgotten my shoes and was worried about being barefoot, so i ran out to the parking lot only to find it was flooded and i had to make my way to the train station through the water but there was no train, only a bus full of people who didn't speak english and wouldn't give me any shoes but then i was trapped on the bus with them and we were in some city in the mountains so i jumped off the bus and started running.... i don't think i need to go on. this is how i dream ALL the time. it's exhausting.
4. Last thing you bought? a 6" subway sammie
5. What are you listening to? my roommate watching tonight's episode of survivor
6. If you were a god/goddess who would you be? probably eris, the goddess of discord and chaos
7. Favourite holiday spots? london, st. croix, napa
8. Reading right now? just finished "the namesake" and getting ready to start "roma". still trying to finish "the corrections" - going on 7 years now....
9. Four words to describe yourself sarcastic, easy-going, friendly, realistic
10. Guilty pleasure? back-to-back episodes of old school 90210 on the weekends
11. Who or what makes you laugh until you’re weak? my niece
12. Favourite spring thing to do? it's a tie - tennis and/or sitting outside on the deck with friends, cooking out and having drinks
13. When you die, what would you like people to say about you at your funeral? "damn, that woman made a killer cocktail"
14. Best thing you ate or drank lately? mexican fiesta with the roommates on cinco de mayo
15. When did you last go for a night out? in munich at the hofbrauhaus last weekend
16. Where is the next place you'd like to travel? Italy!
17. Care to share some wisdom? expect nothing and you will rarely be disappointed
18. Song you can’t get out of your head? beyonce - "single ladies"
19. Thing you are looking forward to? my sister and family coming to chicago in june!!!!! i cannot explain how excited i am for this!!!!!!
20. Which disease or condition would you most like to see eradicated? i'm torn between cancer and alzheimer's because both have brought a lot of sadness to my family
21. What is your most irrational fear? falling down and breaking my teeth. weird, i know.
22. what irritates you on a regular basis? people who can't drive!!!
23. What is the most important lesson you've learned from someone in your life? to treat everyone fairly and not judge others - from my ma-maw who displayed this every single day
Rules of the game. Respond and rework. Answer questions on your own blog. Replace one question. Add one question. Tag 6 people.
ready, set, meme! gretchen, lyn, amanda, rachel, colleen (i know that's only 5, but that's all i have to tag!)
Apr 17, 2009
saw this meme over at the noble savage's blog and thought i'd take a stab at it myself...
15 years ago today I would have been:
· a junior in high school who had just gotten a rockin’ new (used) sports car
· prom dress shopping
· in the middle of tennis season playing #2 doubles
· wondering why high school guys are so ridiculously immature
10 years ago today I would have been:
· still at IU, still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up
· buying alcohol for all of my underage friends
· in a horrible relationship refusing to see how badly I was being treated
· working as a server and bartender at a chain restaurant where I ended up meeting some of my very best friends
5 years ago today I would have been:
· having major meltdowns working three jobs and trying to figure out how to make the idea of moving to chicago a reality
· talking to my friend adam daily about our big plans to relocate to the windy city
· helping a non-profit start a local chapter from scratch
· living with two roommates (aka my parents)
1 year ago today I would have been:
· getting excited for my upcoming trip to London and Amsterdam in may
· working in the middle of downtown Chicago on the magnificent mile
· still single and still pretty ok with that
· deciding to move into a new apartment with three roommies (not my parents)
· celebrating my niece’s 2nd birthday an ocean away
This year I am:
· in a new job with a lot more responsibility and creative freedom
· determined to make better financial decisions and make a plan to pay off my remaining debt
· refusing to feel bad for being single and will NOT resort to internet dating, no matter how easy the commercials make it seem
· looking forward to having my sis and family come visit and stay with me!!
· treasuring the moments of laughter and clarity with my grandfather who is suffering from Alzheimer’s
· joining the board of an organization with a mission very close to my heart
· traveling as much as my vacation time and bank account will allow
Today I:
· had lunch with a dear friend
· fought the battle of gym v. happy hour (happy hour won)
· sang at the top of my lungs while driving with my windows rolled down
· forced myself to work on several tedious projects that will pay off down the road
· drank 5 cups of coffee
· am still wondering why guys are so ridiculously immature
Next year I hope:
· to be in a healthier mode – more exercise, better diet, lower bmi
· to be planning my next oversees trip
· to be looking for my own apartment (unless we all agree to suffer another year in the construction zone of 4119!)
· to hold a higher position on the board
· to have moved up in my job
In five years I hope:
· to be in a much higher position in non-profit development or running a corporate foundation
· my sister and family have been convinced to move back to the states and live near me in chicago
· to have traveled to italy, spain, france and greece
· my parents are healthy and well (that goes for my whole family, actually)
· to be debt-free
· to be as close with my friends as I am now, even though many of them will be settling down, getting married and having kids
15 years ago today I would have been:
· a junior in high school who had just gotten a rockin’ new (used) sports car
· prom dress shopping
· in the middle of tennis season playing #2 doubles
· wondering why high school guys are so ridiculously immature
10 years ago today I would have been:
· still at IU, still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up
· buying alcohol for all of my underage friends
· in a horrible relationship refusing to see how badly I was being treated
· working as a server and bartender at a chain restaurant where I ended up meeting some of my very best friends
5 years ago today I would have been:
· having major meltdowns working three jobs and trying to figure out how to make the idea of moving to chicago a reality
· talking to my friend adam daily about our big plans to relocate to the windy city
· helping a non-profit start a local chapter from scratch
· living with two roommates (aka my parents)
1 year ago today I would have been:
· getting excited for my upcoming trip to London and Amsterdam in may
· working in the middle of downtown Chicago on the magnificent mile
· still single and still pretty ok with that
· deciding to move into a new apartment with three roommies (not my parents)
· celebrating my niece’s 2nd birthday an ocean away
This year I am:
· in a new job with a lot more responsibility and creative freedom
· determined to make better financial decisions and make a plan to pay off my remaining debt
· refusing to feel bad for being single and will NOT resort to internet dating, no matter how easy the commercials make it seem
· looking forward to having my sis and family come visit and stay with me!!
· treasuring the moments of laughter and clarity with my grandfather who is suffering from Alzheimer’s
· joining the board of an organization with a mission very close to my heart
· traveling as much as my vacation time and bank account will allow
Today I:
· had lunch with a dear friend
· fought the battle of gym v. happy hour (happy hour won)
· sang at the top of my lungs while driving with my windows rolled down
· forced myself to work on several tedious projects that will pay off down the road
· drank 5 cups of coffee
· am still wondering why guys are so ridiculously immature
Next year I hope:
· to be in a healthier mode – more exercise, better diet, lower bmi
· to be planning my next oversees trip
· to be looking for my own apartment (unless we all agree to suffer another year in the construction zone of 4119!)
· to hold a higher position on the board
· to have moved up in my job
In five years I hope:
· to be in a much higher position in non-profit development or running a corporate foundation
· my sister and family have been convinced to move back to the states and live near me in chicago
· to have traveled to italy, spain, france and greece
· my parents are healthy and well (that goes for my whole family, actually)
· to be debt-free
· to be as close with my friends as I am now, even though many of them will be settling down, getting married and having kids
Feb 5, 2009
lol
this made me chuckle...
"alone people don't like to hear about together people, ok? even if the alone people are alone by choice. it's sort of mean, it's sort of like bringing a six pack to an AA meeting. keep it to yourself." - callie torres, "grey's anatomy"
"alone people don't like to hear about together people, ok? even if the alone people are alone by choice. it's sort of mean, it's sort of like bringing a six pack to an AA meeting. keep it to yourself." - callie torres, "grey's anatomy"
Jan 29, 2009
we've come for your daughter, chuck
wow, i've been away from the blogging world a long time. the last couple of months have been crazy. i traveled to london and had a great time visiting my sister and her family, followed by returning to the states and giving notice at work, then jetting off to st. croix for a few days of beach and sun, then back home to begin my new job. whew! now that i've been back and have a whole week behind me in the new job and no trips out of the country coming up anytime soon, i figured i'd get back to the business of blogging. after all, i have very important, life-changing things to ponder about, the most recent being the beetlejuice theory.
my friend rachel and i have been joking for a while about this phenomenon but didn't really have a name for it until recently. let me first give some background for those who have not - gasp! - seen the movie beetlejuice. in beetlejuice, michael keeton plays this creepily entertaining dead guy who can be summoned by the living if they call his name three times. they say "beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice!" and in he pops, causing all sorts of trouble and chaos until he is banished again. in the beginning he seems to be a good guy, but you quickly learn he only has his own interests in mind and he keeps coming around, regardless of the fact that he isn't wanted or needed.
so, back to the theory. it has come to the attention of both rachel and myself that there are certain exes in our lives that seem to crawl out of the woodwork and contact us at the most random times. weeks or months will pass with no word from them and then suddenly - poof! - we get a call, a text, an email, a facebook message, etc. as we compared notes, we started to realize that the exes seemed to turn back up within a day, maybe hours or sometimes even minutes, of their names being brought up in conversation. hence, the beetlejuice theory was born. much like the character the theory is named after, we don't really want to hear from these people. they've been banished to our past for a reason and yet they still come around. they seemed great at first, but showed their true colors at some point and now just pop back around for various reasons, all pertaining to their own interests, not ours. inevitably, they will disappear again once they realize we are not here to play along and be at their beck and call; still, they never seem to vanish completely.
i do have to make one important note - the beetlejuice theory only works when the person who reappears is beetlejuiced on accident, i.e. mentioned in random conversation, re-telling a story, etc. it does not work to sit and chant an ex's name in the hope that he will magically text you. the whole premise of the beetlejuice theory is inadvertently summoning someone who will annoy, frustrate, and wreak havoc in your current life for their own means.
my advice - tread lightly when you talk of exes past. they will come back to haunt you in some way, shape or form.
my friend rachel and i have been joking for a while about this phenomenon but didn't really have a name for it until recently. let me first give some background for those who have not - gasp! - seen the movie beetlejuice. in beetlejuice, michael keeton plays this creepily entertaining dead guy who can be summoned by the living if they call his name three times. they say "beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice!" and in he pops, causing all sorts of trouble and chaos until he is banished again. in the beginning he seems to be a good guy, but you quickly learn he only has his own interests in mind and he keeps coming around, regardless of the fact that he isn't wanted or needed.
so, back to the theory. it has come to the attention of both rachel and myself that there are certain exes in our lives that seem to crawl out of the woodwork and contact us at the most random times. weeks or months will pass with no word from them and then suddenly - poof! - we get a call, a text, an email, a facebook message, etc. as we compared notes, we started to realize that the exes seemed to turn back up within a day, maybe hours or sometimes even minutes, of their names being brought up in conversation. hence, the beetlejuice theory was born. much like the character the theory is named after, we don't really want to hear from these people. they've been banished to our past for a reason and yet they still come around. they seemed great at first, but showed their true colors at some point and now just pop back around for various reasons, all pertaining to their own interests, not ours. inevitably, they will disappear again once they realize we are not here to play along and be at their beck and call; still, they never seem to vanish completely.
i do have to make one important note - the beetlejuice theory only works when the person who reappears is beetlejuiced on accident, i.e. mentioned in random conversation, re-telling a story, etc. it does not work to sit and chant an ex's name in the hope that he will magically text you. the whole premise of the beetlejuice theory is inadvertently summoning someone who will annoy, frustrate, and wreak havoc in your current life for their own means.
my advice - tread lightly when you talk of exes past. they will come back to haunt you in some way, shape or form.
Dec 4, 2008
prop 8 - the musical
i saw this over at tankboy today and couldn't resist posting it here. hilarious.
See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die
Nov 30, 2008
best christmas tree ever
a good friend of my mom's turned up for a little get-together on friday with a lovely bag of goodies - yummy smelling candle, bottle of wine, and a homemade christmas tree. i think the picture speaks for itself....
Nov 26, 2008
thank you sir, may i have another?!
so there we were - self and i at a thank you reception for a charity giving campaign at a major hospital. execs and hospital administrators lined the back wall in rows of chairs set up for the event. the hospital CEO stood on the dais at the front of the room, thanking everyone for their generosity and then announced he would be presenting oversized, cardboard checks to each of the three charity partners. he called the name of the first charity and i rose from my seat to walk to the front of the room to accept the check on behalf of my organization. and this is what happened....
self: don't trip, for god's sake. seriously do NOT trip.
me: totally ignoring you right now.
self: ok, we're almost there. firm handshake, then smile pretty for the camera
me: (reaching out to shake CEO's hand) i've done this a million times. don't talk to me.
self: ok, fine. just get in the group pic with the CEO and the other 2 execs and smile.
me: stop annoying me. i know how to hold a huge cardboard check and smile.
self: ok, ok. oh wait, picture lady wants you to move forward a litte. better hold that check at the side and the bottom.
me: ok, ok. i'm not going to drop the f'ing check. i'll just step forward.....
self: oh my god. you did not just do that.
me: yeah, pretty sure i did.
self: you realize that when you stepped forward, the CEO did too, and you grazed his....
me: yes! i know. i may have accidentally brushed him with my hand in an inappropriate place.
self: ha ha!!! you touched his penis!! how embarrassing!!!
me: it was an accident!!
self: wow. you get an $11,000 check and you cop a feel. nice. classy.
me: please shut up.
self: i just hope that look on your face got caught on camera! see if we get invited back next time!
me: walking back to chair now and pretending that did NOT happen.
self: live in denial. fine with me.
me: you're enjoying this too much.
self: you should have just tripped. would have been less embarrassing.
me: i hate you.
self: don't trip, for god's sake. seriously do NOT trip.
me: totally ignoring you right now.
self: ok, we're almost there. firm handshake, then smile pretty for the camera
me: (reaching out to shake CEO's hand) i've done this a million times. don't talk to me.
self: ok, fine. just get in the group pic with the CEO and the other 2 execs and smile.
me: stop annoying me. i know how to hold a huge cardboard check and smile.
self: ok, ok. oh wait, picture lady wants you to move forward a litte. better hold that check at the side and the bottom.
me: ok, ok. i'm not going to drop the f'ing check. i'll just step forward.....
self: oh my god. you did not just do that.
me: yeah, pretty sure i did.
self: you realize that when you stepped forward, the CEO did too, and you grazed his....
me: yes! i know. i may have accidentally brushed him with my hand in an inappropriate place.
self: ha ha!!! you touched his penis!! how embarrassing!!!
me: it was an accident!!
self: wow. you get an $11,000 check and you cop a feel. nice. classy.
me: please shut up.
self: i just hope that look on your face got caught on camera! see if we get invited back next time!
me: walking back to chair now and pretending that did NOT happen.
self: live in denial. fine with me.
me: you're enjoying this too much.
self: you should have just tripped. would have been less embarrassing.
me: i hate you.
Nov 25, 2008
reason #128 why i love coming home for thanksgiving
thanksgiving with parents
thanksgiving with self
no contest.
Nov 12, 2008
season of change
the other day i was walking down the street, kicking my way through the piles of orange, red and gold littering the sidewalk. looking up at the trees, i realized they had shed most of their leaves and were starting to look rather bare, a sure sign that winter is just around the corner. as i thought about how quickly the summer had become fall and now fall was turning to winter, i began to wonder where that time had gone and how it had passed me by so fast. i thought surely it must have been because nothing of note had happened and i had just gone along with my normal routine in a daze, not really paying attention to particular events. immediately after that thought crossed my mind, i almost stopped in my tracks and laughed at how ridiculous it was that i could dismiss these past few months as anything but exciting.
the more i thought about the last few months, the more i realized that many things and people near and dear to me had changed. one friend became a new wife, my sister became a mother for the second time, my niece became a big sister, other friends became pet owners and car owners. some started new relationships, some ended old ones. new jobs, new apartments and new experiences were the norm. this autumn has been nothing short of - appropriately so - a time for turning over new leaves.
on a grand scale, we saw the election of the first african-american president, a man who is promising change and hope to a country starved for better government and leadership. i attended the rally fondly referred to by chicagoans as "obamapalooza" on election night and i still cannot find the appropriate words to describe the atmosphere among the hundreds of thousands gathered there in grant park that night. it was exciting, motivating, inspiring, and moving. people were cheering, crying, chanting and celebrating. saying i'm not sure that it will ever be possible again in my lifetime to feel that sense of camaraderie is probably a gross understatement.
as we all make changes in our lives and our new leaders strive to provoke change throughout our country, let's keep in mind that change is a good thing. with change comes hope - hope for a better life, a better future, a better understanding of each other and ourselves.
the more i thought about the last few months, the more i realized that many things and people near and dear to me had changed. one friend became a new wife, my sister became a mother for the second time, my niece became a big sister, other friends became pet owners and car owners. some started new relationships, some ended old ones. new jobs, new apartments and new experiences were the norm. this autumn has been nothing short of - appropriately so - a time for turning over new leaves.
on a grand scale, we saw the election of the first african-american president, a man who is promising change and hope to a country starved for better government and leadership. i attended the rally fondly referred to by chicagoans as "obamapalooza" on election night and i still cannot find the appropriate words to describe the atmosphere among the hundreds of thousands gathered there in grant park that night. it was exciting, motivating, inspiring, and moving. people were cheering, crying, chanting and celebrating. saying i'm not sure that it will ever be possible again in my lifetime to feel that sense of camaraderie is probably a gross understatement.
as we all make changes in our lives and our new leaders strive to provoke change throughout our country, let's keep in mind that change is a good thing. with change comes hope - hope for a better life, a better future, a better understanding of each other and ourselves.
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." -Mahatma Gandhi
Nov 3, 2008
tickets?!! i LOVE tickets!!
well, it's official. i am one of 65,000 lucky recipients of a ticket to attend the election celebration, dubbed in chicago as "obamapalooza", tomorrow night. wooo hooo!! yes, it will be a giant pain in the ass to get down there and back home, but this is history in the making and i'm going to be there!!!
don't forget to vote!!!
don't forget to vote!!!
Nov 2, 2008
why my sister is awesome....
she sent this little treasure back with my mom after her recent visit to the UK. she just thought i'd love it. she was right. thanks sis!
Sep 29, 2008
shore it up and get back to us
as good as tina fey is at portraying sarah palin, let's hope there's no reason for her to continue in this role after election day. in the meantime, watch and laugh.... (and be disturbed that this isn't all that far off the mark!)
to view parts of the actual couric/palin interview, click here, here and don't forget here
to view parts of the actual couric/palin interview, click here, here and don't forget here
Aug 16, 2008
killer cake
should i ever get married, this may very well be my cake....
(thanks to jen for posting the link to cake wrecks where this little work of art was featured)
(thanks to jen for posting the link to cake wrecks where this little work of art was featured)
Aug 11, 2008
just one of those days
have you ever had one of those days where you seem to have stumbled into some kind of dark hole and you just can't quite claw your way back to the top and so you end up wasting hours feeling dejected, sad, lonely, weepy, angry, frustrated, annoyed, and restless? please say yes or i'm going to have myself committed immediately. yes? ok, whew. because that's the day i'm having today. no reason for it at all, really - slept in later than normal for a monday and had the glorious option to work from home. i sat in my pjs for half the day, sipping coffee and dealing with work at my leisure. outside the weather was as close to perfect as it will ever get - low 80s, cool breeze, no humidity and not a cloud in the sky. i sat outside devouring a new book and my lunch in this fantastic weather - something most people aren't lucky enough to do mid-day on a monday.
still, from the time i woke up this morning, i've felt like there's been a damp, dark cloud hovering over me, raining down a mist of gloom. i've spontaneously burst into tears 4 times today, yelled at the top of my lungs (thank god i was in the confines of my apartment and not overheard) at the construction noise outside to "just fucking stop for one fucking minute!!!", lost my cool when i couldn't get the dvd player to work and threw my cell phone in frustration, ignored incoming calls because i didn't want to talk to anyone but then paced around the apartment like a lost puppy because i was lonely, and basically proceeded to throw the biggest, most obnoxious pity party you can imagine.
it was just one of those days when i started feeling sorry for myself for being alone and since then self and i have been chipping away at our self-esteem and any shred of hope we may have had for actually finding someone to put up with our neuroses. we now effectively believe that no one of the male species would ever find us even remotely attractive (as illustrated by heinous trip to the grocery store where all men were there with cute, skinny blonds - no joke) and we will die alone. i'm going to have to get one of those pets that are trained to call 911 or press some emergency button when i fall and break my hip or pass out from too much wine and hit my head, leaving me in a pool of blood and on the verge of death. but that plan probably wouldn't work either, as i have horrible allergies and most of the pets that are trainable for those purposes would send me into the throws of a life-threatening asthma attack. six of one, half dozen of the other, i suppose. *sigh*
and so this is how it has gone today - woe is me, woe is me, woe is me. ugh. i'm so sick of myself right now i could puke. i apologize for ranting here and please don't call the police or my roommates to come check that i haven't managed to finally OD on ice cream and sex & the city. sometimes it just helps to type away and pour all of the gloomy feelings into my blog. if you stopped reading after the first sentence, good for you. if you stayed for the whole diatribe, thank you. i'll be better tomorrow. i promise.
still, from the time i woke up this morning, i've felt like there's been a damp, dark cloud hovering over me, raining down a mist of gloom. i've spontaneously burst into tears 4 times today, yelled at the top of my lungs (thank god i was in the confines of my apartment and not overheard) at the construction noise outside to "just fucking stop for one fucking minute!!!", lost my cool when i couldn't get the dvd player to work and threw my cell phone in frustration, ignored incoming calls because i didn't want to talk to anyone but then paced around the apartment like a lost puppy because i was lonely, and basically proceeded to throw the biggest, most obnoxious pity party you can imagine.
it was just one of those days when i started feeling sorry for myself for being alone and since then self and i have been chipping away at our self-esteem and any shred of hope we may have had for actually finding someone to put up with our neuroses. we now effectively believe that no one of the male species would ever find us even remotely attractive (as illustrated by heinous trip to the grocery store where all men were there with cute, skinny blonds - no joke) and we will die alone. i'm going to have to get one of those pets that are trained to call 911 or press some emergency button when i fall and break my hip or pass out from too much wine and hit my head, leaving me in a pool of blood and on the verge of death. but that plan probably wouldn't work either, as i have horrible allergies and most of the pets that are trainable for those purposes would send me into the throws of a life-threatening asthma attack. six of one, half dozen of the other, i suppose. *sigh*
and so this is how it has gone today - woe is me, woe is me, woe is me. ugh. i'm so sick of myself right now i could puke. i apologize for ranting here and please don't call the police or my roommates to come check that i haven't managed to finally OD on ice cream and sex & the city. sometimes it just helps to type away and pour all of the gloomy feelings into my blog. if you stopped reading after the first sentence, good for you. if you stayed for the whole diatribe, thank you. i'll be better tomorrow. i promise.
Aug 6, 2008
thou shall not steal.... except from me
lovely place, isn't it? such a wonderful place is the toll plaza in queretaro, mexico that someone decided to charge their $5.75 toll to my debit card. that's right - some asshole lifted my debit card number from somewhere and used it throughout mexico. imagine my surprise to go to my online account and see that i have 5 charges in the amounts of $115, $5.75, $90, $60 and another for $5.75 (the lovely toll plaza in salamanca, mexico, apparently) pending approval. luckily, as they are all pending (except for the one that had actually been denied for some reason), the amounts will be credited back to my account by tomorrow, hopefully, and if any other charges go through i can simply appeal to my bank and get the funds back.still, what a pain in the ass. now i have to wait 5-7 days for a new debit card, change any recurring payments i have set up to that card and basically keep a leary eye on my account for fear of being ripped off again.
it was only about 5 or 6 weeks ago that i had money stolen out of my wallet by catering staff at a work event and now someone has gotten my debit card number and had no qualms about turning my hard-earned dollars into pesos for him/herself.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE???
Jul 30, 2008
Jul 23, 2008
a must see
i watched this flick with one of my roommies last night and it had us laughing and cackling the whole way through. if you haven't seen "death at a funeral" yet, go rent it . as the dear noble savage put it in her review of the film..."Hilarious indie British comedy, had me in stitches. Made The Noble Husband belly laugh and bay like a donkey"
you're welcome.
you're welcome.
Jul 22, 2008
fish food
i heard about this new rage in pedicures yesterday and had to force myself not to do any of the following:
1) throw up
2) put on socks
3) curl my toes in disgust for the remainder of the day
4) find someone who actually paid for this and smack them
5) contact the health department
6) immediately email everyone i know and gross them out, too
7) did i mention throwing up?
now you're curious, so here ya go....
1) throw up
2) put on socks
3) curl my toes in disgust for the remainder of the day
4) find someone who actually paid for this and smack them
5) contact the health department
6) immediately email everyone i know and gross them out, too
7) did i mention throwing up?
now you're curious, so here ya go....
tag! you're it!
i was tagged by the noble savage for this meme. it's pretty fun. try it if you wish!
The rules are simple: one word answers to 40 questions.
Where is your cell phone? desk
Your significant other? imaginary
Your hair? ponytail
Your mother? smart
Your father? funny
Your favorite time of day? 5:00
Your dream last night? insane
Your favourite drink? coffee
Your dream goal? happiness
The room you’re in? cubicle
Your ex? ugh
Your fear? drowning
Where do you want to be in six years? successful
What are you not? argumentative
Your favourite meal? sushi
One of your wish list items? iphone
The last thing you did? emailed
Where you grew up? mayberry
What are you wearing? clothes
Your TV is? off
Your pets? none
Your computer? charging
Your life? satisfactory
Your mood? pensive
Missing someone? sis
Your car? parked
Something you’re not wearing? lotion
Favorite store? target
Your summer? fabulous
Your favourite colour? blue
When is the last time you laughed? today
When is the last time you cried? today
Your health? fine
Your children? none
Your future? bright
Your beliefs? liberal
Young or old? young
Your image? diplomatic
Your appearance? normal
Would you live your life over again knowing what you know? absolutely
The rules are simple: one word answers to 40 questions.
Where is your cell phone? desk
Your significant other? imaginary
Your hair? ponytail
Your mother? smart
Your father? funny
Your favorite time of day? 5:00
Your dream last night? insane
Your favourite drink? coffee
Your dream goal? happiness
The room you’re in? cubicle
Your ex? ugh
Your fear? drowning
Where do you want to be in six years? successful
What are you not? argumentative
Your favourite meal? sushi
One of your wish list items? iphone
The last thing you did? emailed
Where you grew up? mayberry
What are you wearing? clothes
Your TV is? off
Your pets? none
Your computer? charging
Your life? satisfactory
Your mood? pensive
Missing someone? sis
Your car? parked
Something you’re not wearing? lotion
Favorite store? target
Your summer? fabulous
Your favourite colour? blue
When is the last time you laughed? today
When is the last time you cried? today
Your health? fine
Your children? none
Your future? bright
Your beliefs? liberal
Young or old? young
Your image? diplomatic
Your appearance? normal
Would you live your life over again knowing what you know? absolutely
Jun 30, 2008
meme's the word
i was tagged by adam to do this meme, so here we go.....
what was i doing 10 years ago?
good question. i was probably drunk. just kidding. (sorta) ten years ago i was at IU, most likely taking a summer course or two and trying to figure out what i wanted to be when i grew up. here it is, 2008 and i'm still waiting for that epiphany to hit...
5 things on my to-do list today
1. upload flip cup and pride photos and send out to the masses
2. play tennis
3. hang up the pile of laundry in my room
4. balance my checkbook
5. eat something - anything - healthy
snacks i enjoy
unhealthy variety:
nobby's nuts
mexican corn dip
cold stone creamery coffee ice cream with fudge and oreos
healthier options:
strawberries with fat free cool whip
cherry tomatoes and hummus
grapes
places i have lived, in order
charlestown, indiana
bloomington, indiana
charlotte, north carolina
chicago, illinois
5 things i would do today if i were a billionaire
1. pay off all debt for myself, close friends and family
2. start my own non-profit foundation
3. buy a flat in london so i could go visit my sis whenever i want
4. buy 2 places in chicago - one for me and one for my guests
5. invest in funds for my parents' retirement, my own, and my nieces and nephews schooling
i tag rachel, amity and jenny for this thing!
what was i doing 10 years ago?
good question. i was probably drunk. just kidding. (sorta) ten years ago i was at IU, most likely taking a summer course or two and trying to figure out what i wanted to be when i grew up. here it is, 2008 and i'm still waiting for that epiphany to hit...
5 things on my to-do list today
1. upload flip cup and pride photos and send out to the masses
2. play tennis
3. hang up the pile of laundry in my room
4. balance my checkbook
5. eat something - anything - healthy
snacks i enjoy
unhealthy variety:
nobby's nuts
mexican corn dip
cold stone creamery coffee ice cream with fudge and oreos
healthier options:
strawberries with fat free cool whip
cherry tomatoes and hummus
grapes
places i have lived, in order
charlestown, indiana
bloomington, indiana
charlotte, north carolina
chicago, illinois
5 things i would do today if i were a billionaire
1. pay off all debt for myself, close friends and family
2. start my own non-profit foundation
3. buy a flat in london so i could go visit my sis whenever i want
4. buy 2 places in chicago - one for me and one for my guests
5. invest in funds for my parents' retirement, my own, and my nieces and nephews schooling
i tag rachel, amity and jenny for this thing!
Jun 29, 2008
I saw this list of Entertainment Weekly’s ‘100 new classics’ over at Noble Savage who got it from What If No One’s Watching and thought it would be fun to give it a go. I’ve seen the ones bolded.
1. Pulp Fiction (1994)
2. The Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-03)
3. Titanic (1997)
4. Blue Velvet (1986)
5. Toy Story (1995)
6. Saving Private Ryan (1998 )
7. Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)
8. The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
9. Die Hard (1988 )
10. Moulin Rouge (2001)
11. This Is Spinal Tap (1984)
12. The Matrix (1999)
13. GoodFellas (1990)
14. Crumb (1995)
15. Edward Scissorhands (1990)
16. Boogie Nights (1997)
17. Jerry Maguire (1996)
18. Do the Right Thing (1989)
19. Casino Royale (2006)
20. The Lion King (1994)
21. Schindler’s List (1993)
22. Rushmore (1998 )
23. Memento (2001)
24. A Room With a View (1986)
25. Shrek (2001)
26. Hoop Dreams (1994)
27. Alien (1986)
28. Wings of Desire (1988 )
29. The Bourne Supremacy (2004)
30. When Harry Met Sally… (1989)
31. Brokeback Mountain (2005)
32. Fight Club (1999)
33. The Breakfast Club (1985)
34. Fargo (1996)
35. The Incredibles (2004)
36. Spider-Man 2 (2004)
37. Pretty Woman (1990)
38. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
39. The Sixth Sense (1999)
40. Speed (1994)
41. Dazed and Confused (1993)
42. Clueless (1995) 4
43. Gladiator (2000)
44. The Player (1992)
45. Rain Man (1988 )
46. Children of Men (2006)
47. Men in Black (1997)
48. Scarface (1983)
49. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)
50. The Piano (1993)
51. There Will Be Blood (2007)
52. The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad (1988 )
53. The Truman Show (1998 )
54. Fatal Attraction (1987)
55. Risky Business (1983)
56. The Lives of Others (2006)
57. There’s Something About Mary (1998)
58. Ghostbusters (1984)
59. L.A. Confidential (1997)
60. Scream (1996)
61. Beverly Hills Cop (1984)
62. sex, lies and videotape (1989)
63. Big (1988)
64. No Country For Old Men (2007)
65. Dirty Dancing (1987)
66. Natural Born Killers (1994)
67. Donnie Brasco (1997)
68. Witness (1985)
69. All About My Mother (1999)
70. Broadcast News (1987)
71. Unforgiven (1992)
72. Thelma & Louise (1991)
73. Office Space (1999)
74. Drugstore Cowboy (1989)
75. Out of Africa (1985)
76. The Departed (2006)
77. Sid and Nancy (1986)
78. Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
79. Waiting for Guffman (1996)
80. Michael Clayton (2007)
81. Moonstruck (1987)
82. Lost in Translation (2003)
83. Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn (1987)
84. Sideways (2004)
85. The 40 Year-Old Virgin (2005)
86. Y Tu Mamá También (2002)
87. Swingers (1996)
88. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)
89. Breaking the Waves (1996)
90. Napoleon Dynamite (2004)
91. Back to the Future (1985)
92. Menace II Society (1993)
93. Ed Wood (1994)
94. Full Metal Jacket (1987)
95. In the Mood for Love (2001)
96. Far From Heaven (2002)
97. Glory (1989)
98. The Talented Mr. Ripley (1999)
99. The Blair Witch Project (1999)
100. South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut (1999)
not too shabby, but it looks like i have a big list of movies to get caught up on when i'm holed up in my apartment this winter!
Jun 6, 2008
25 is the new 80?
i was standing at the pick-up counter at starbucks, minding my own business and waiting for my grande skinny latte when i overheard this conversation between two girls also waiting for their coffee…..
girl 1: “oh my god. there is NO way you are older than me. i think i’m the oldest person on our team.”
girl 2: “i don’t know about that…. i’m sure i’m older than you”
girl 1: “no way. i mean, i’m 23 and i don’t know anyone older”
girl 2: “yeah, i’m definitely older than you. believe me, i’m old.”
girl 1: “it’s not like you’re 25 or something! come on!”
at this point i turned and bitch slapped this girl. (ok, not really, but i wanted to)
girl 2: “no, i’m 24, but i’m turning 25 in october! Ugh!”
another bitch slap.
girl 1: “oh, that’s still MONTHS away! you definitely do not look 25, trust me. you look young!”
and yes, bitch slap #3.
girl 2: “thanks. oh my god. how much sugar are you putting in that?!”
(at this point both have gotten their iced coffees and are at behind me at the counter adding sugar and milk)
girl 1: giggling “oh i like to put a lot of sugar and a lot of milk. you know, so it doesn’t even taste like coffee!”
girl 2: “ooohhh. good idea!”
and off they went to drink their non-coffee tasting sugary milk drinks and lament about having one foot in the grave at the ripe old ages of 23 and 24. it’s a good thing that in my 30s i have the inner peace and strength to refrain from yelling at and/or inflicting violence upon idiot stick figures with no soul. i returned to my desk and decided not too long after to pack it in for the day and head home. after all, us senior citizens need our rest.
girl 1: “oh my god. there is NO way you are older than me. i think i’m the oldest person on our team.”
girl 2: “i don’t know about that…. i’m sure i’m older than you”
girl 1: “no way. i mean, i’m 23 and i don’t know anyone older”
girl 2: “yeah, i’m definitely older than you. believe me, i’m old.”
girl 1: “it’s not like you’re 25 or something! come on!”
at this point i turned and bitch slapped this girl. (ok, not really, but i wanted to)
girl 2: “no, i’m 24, but i’m turning 25 in october! Ugh!”
another bitch slap.
girl 1: “oh, that’s still MONTHS away! you definitely do not look 25, trust me. you look young!”
and yes, bitch slap #3.
girl 2: “thanks. oh my god. how much sugar are you putting in that?!”
(at this point both have gotten their iced coffees and are at behind me at the counter adding sugar and milk)
girl 1: giggling “oh i like to put a lot of sugar and a lot of milk. you know, so it doesn’t even taste like coffee!”
girl 2: “ooohhh. good idea!”
and off they went to drink their non-coffee tasting sugary milk drinks and lament about having one foot in the grave at the ripe old ages of 23 and 24. it’s a good thing that in my 30s i have the inner peace and strength to refrain from yelling at and/or inflicting violence upon idiot stick figures with no soul. i returned to my desk and decided not too long after to pack it in for the day and head home. after all, us senior citizens need our rest.
Apr 21, 2008
drink one for the kids!
sitting outside at one of our favorite neighborhood establishments enjoying a late lunch yesterday, the roommate and i began to notice how many small children there were in the space around us. there were babies, toddlers and strollers galore. mothers-to-be waddled down the street in their cute pregger gear while dads pulled kids in little red wagons. it was like a scene out of a modern day norman rockwell painting. and so the roommate and i began to lament about our singleness in a sea of young families in the mini-suburb our cute northside neighborhood has become. not that we mind it, you see, because if i were coupled and starting a family and wanting to live in the city, i would definitely choose this area to live and raise my kids. that said, to see all of these young men and women, happily populating the planet with offspring and going about their family activities makes some of the dwindling single population feel somewhat dejected, broody and a little bitter.
and so, to live in harmony with the coupleds and the marrieds and the children, the roommate and i have decided we should take these scenarios and add alcohol. lots of alcohol. because summer in chicago seems so fleeting and wonderful, everyone likes to enjoy the outside patios at the bars and restaurants, which means there is an abnormal number of children at places you would normally consider to be for the over-21 crowd. from the months of april to september, you will enjoy your beer with a side of screaming child. or you may be sipping wine next to an angelic baby sleeping in his or her stroller. sometimes you'll have a friendly toddler sidle up to your table and watch you with interest as you gulp your bloody mary like it is magic tonic to a life threatening illness.
so i propose a drinking game to go with the invasion of the children at my local pubs. it's a simple format - everyone at your table drinks when there are children or pregnant people in the immediate vicinity. the rules are as follows:
each baby = 1 drink
set of twins = 2 drinks
each pregnant woman = 1 drink
screaming baby = 2 drinks
each toddler = 2 drinks
toddler picking nose, eating food off the ground or other disgusting behavior = 3 drinks
parents there with children and drinking = 1 drink for each parent enjoying an adult bevvy
each time someone at your table "oohs", "ahhs" or otherwise coos over any child, regardless of child's age = 1 drink
toddler running around, causing chaos, with no reprimand from parents = 1 shot
we may add more as the spring and summer go on, but for now i think this is a pretty good start and a sure-fire way to get you nice and drinky on a sunny afternoon out with friends. this is also proof that i can turn just about anything into a drinking game. and i'm not sure if that's actually a good thing or not, but it makes mini-suburbia much more fun.
and so, to live in harmony with the coupleds and the marrieds and the children, the roommate and i have decided we should take these scenarios and add alcohol. lots of alcohol. because summer in chicago seems so fleeting and wonderful, everyone likes to enjoy the outside patios at the bars and restaurants, which means there is an abnormal number of children at places you would normally consider to be for the over-21 crowd. from the months of april to september, you will enjoy your beer with a side of screaming child. or you may be sipping wine next to an angelic baby sleeping in his or her stroller. sometimes you'll have a friendly toddler sidle up to your table and watch you with interest as you gulp your bloody mary like it is magic tonic to a life threatening illness.
so i propose a drinking game to go with the invasion of the children at my local pubs. it's a simple format - everyone at your table drinks when there are children or pregnant people in the immediate vicinity. the rules are as follows:
each baby = 1 drink
set of twins = 2 drinks
each pregnant woman = 1 drink
screaming baby = 2 drinks
each toddler = 2 drinks
toddler picking nose, eating food off the ground or other disgusting behavior = 3 drinks
parents there with children and drinking = 1 drink for each parent enjoying an adult bevvy
each time someone at your table "oohs", "ahhs" or otherwise coos over any child, regardless of child's age = 1 drink
toddler running around, causing chaos, with no reprimand from parents = 1 shot
we may add more as the spring and summer go on, but for now i think this is a pretty good start and a sure-fire way to get you nice and drinky on a sunny afternoon out with friends. this is also proof that i can turn just about anything into a drinking game. and i'm not sure if that's actually a good thing or not, but it makes mini-suburbia much more fun.
Apr 16, 2008
you'll thank me for this later
I saw this meme on The Noble Savage . The original authors of this exercise are Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, and Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University. If you participate in this blog game, they ask that you PLEASE acknowledge their copyright.
Bold the true statements. You can explain further if you wish.
1. Father went to college
2. Father finished college
3. Mother went to college
4. Mother finished college
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor.I have two uncles who are doctors. One of my dad’s sister's is a professor.
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers.
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home.
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
9. Were read children’s books by a parent
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
Swimming lessons, tennis lessons, horseback riding lessons
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
thank you mom and dad!
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
didn't take many, but did stay in hotels when we visited florida, tennessee and vegas
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
25. You had your own room as a child
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course
28. Had your own TV in your room in high school
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
31. Went on a cruise with your family
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family
to echo the noble savage, it is a nice reminder of the luxuries i had as a child to go through this meme. parents who read to me, payed for most of my education, encouraged me to take other courses and lessons, allowed me to have new clothes at the beginning of each school year and bought me a cute, used car when i turned 16.... wow. i'd say i had it pretty good growing up and looking back i see mom and dad were right - i AM thanking them for it all later. i just wish i had shown more appreciation for all they did for me at the time.
Bold the true statements. You can explain further if you wish.
1. Father went to college
2. Father finished college
3. Mother went to college
4. Mother finished college
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor.I have two uncles who are doctors. One of my dad’s sister's is a professor.
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers.
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home.
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
9. Were read children’s books by a parent
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
Swimming lessons, tennis lessons, horseback riding lessons
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
thank you mom and dad!
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
didn't take many, but did stay in hotels when we visited florida, tennessee and vegas
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child
23. You and your family lived in a single-family house
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
25. You had your own room as a child
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18
27. Participated in a SAT/ACT prep course
28. Had your own TV in your room in high school
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in high school or college
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
31. Went on a cruise with your family
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family
to echo the noble savage, it is a nice reminder of the luxuries i had as a child to go through this meme. parents who read to me, payed for most of my education, encouraged me to take other courses and lessons, allowed me to have new clothes at the beginning of each school year and bought me a cute, used car when i turned 16.... wow. i'd say i had it pretty good growing up and looking back i see mom and dad were right - i AM thanking them for it all later. i just wish i had shown more appreciation for all they did for me at the time.
Mar 23, 2008
Mar 19, 2008
fun with cross stitch
creative cross stitch.....
(thanks to casi for enlightening me to the creative craft of subversive cross stitch!)
Mar 18, 2008
"...but i can use a bandsaw like a mo fo"
in yet another perfect example of how my lack of domesticity has been ingrained in my very being for 30 plus years, i was telling a story last night that actually caused me to utter the phrase in the title line of this post. yes, it's true - my bandsaw skills are pretty f'in good (or at least they were last time i put them to the test). my sewing skills? horrific, at best. case in point - the story i was recounting last night.....
when i was in seventh grade, we were required to take 9 weeks of industrial arts (woodworking) and 9 weeks of home economics (sewing). going in to these classes, the popular (stereotypical) assumption was that the girls would excel at the sewing class, while the boys would do better in woodworking, though as long as no one stabbed their hand with the electric sewing machine or lost a finger at the mercy of a table saw, the teachers didn't care one way or the other and yelled at us equally when our skills weren't up to par. woodworking came first for me and i actually did quite well, painstakingly cutting the shape of the state of indiana out of a piece of wood and turning it promptly into an IU clock. if you've never seen the state of indiana on a map, or have never had the misfortune to try to cut it out of wood, you should know that it has a lot of little curves and ridges at the bottom and actually makes for a tough pattern when trying to negotiate an electric saw to smoothly form the border. however, i cut out my great state with care and proudly shellacked the hell out of it once it was sanded smooth. bless my parents for hanging it up - though i think it found a home in the seldom used den.
so with great accomplishment i completed my industrial arts project earlier than most of the class. rather than take on another project, i was enlisted by my friend ben to help him with his own indiana-shaped clock. poor thing just couldn't seem to cut out the bottom border with all of its curves. his block of wood looked more like he had hacked at it with a tiny axe than run the blade of the saw around it. so, i stepped in with my newfound woodworking ability and helped him salvage his project. and because of me, my friend ben got a respectable B on his project and told me he owed me. i shrugged it off, thinking that i was now the master of all things industrial art-ish and i wouldn't need to call in that favor. boy, was i wrong.
nine weeks of sewing followed the woodworking class and i found that my sewing skills weren't nearly as quick to emerge as my woodworking skills. in fact, they never actually emerged at all. one of the first things we did was write our names in large script across a sheet of notebook paper and then we had to use the sewing machine to trace our name. granted, i think i got screwed because my name was 6 loooooong letters, but i was determined to do this. at the end of the class, i was sweating and annoyed and my sheet of notebook paper looked like a small animal had chewed its was across it, rather than having my name perfectly punched out across the page like most of my classmates. this gave me cause for alarm. i knew the next 9 weeks would not be nearly as fun as industrial arts. we made potholders, which i managed to muddle through well enough. then came the big dog. it was time to make the pillow. i chose a square pillow in some god-awful royal blue furry material and went to town. i would sew, pick up the material, realize it was crooked, and start over. a useful little tool called the seam ripper became my best friend. i sewed and sewed, watching with panic as my fellow domestic engineers hummed away at their machines, neatly putting together pillows of many sizes, shapes and colors. in choosing to do a square pillow, i also was forced to sew an applique of letters or numbers onto the front, so that the project proved as difficult as those of various shapes that other students had chosen. barely able to sew straight lines to put the pillow together, i had no idea how i was going to be able to get the 9 and 5 (yes, i put my high school graduation year on the pillow) to appear without the use of super glue.
and that's when i remembered that my friend ben owed me a favor. looking to see how he was progressing one day near the end of the 9 weeks, i was amazed to see that not only had he finished his project, but he was also working on an additional small project to while away his time. and so there i went, over to cash in on that favor. sneakily, we managed to finish my pillow with him doing most of the work to apply the numbers to the front and i stuffed the monstrosity with relief. i had barely hand stitched the closing when the deadline hit and projects had to be turned in. somehow i managed to get an A in the class, if for no other reason than my teacher watched me in so much exasperation that maybe she felt sorry for me. as that particular teacher was not known as one to show sympathy, however, i also have to give ben his fair share of credit for my grade.
and so it went - the tennis-playing, cheerleading, girly-girl and the football QB, star wrestler and all-around jock sawed and sewed their way to good grades and respectable projects, managing to break down a few stereotypes in the process.
to this day i can't sew on a button. stitch witchery saves my life (and the hems of my pants) and i'm more than happy to pay my neighborhood cleaners to bail me out of any repair work that any of my clothing needs. could i still cut a chunk of wood into the state of indiana if i had the saw and the materials? like a mo fo.
when i was in seventh grade, we were required to take 9 weeks of industrial arts (woodworking) and 9 weeks of home economics (sewing). going in to these classes, the popular (stereotypical) assumption was that the girls would excel at the sewing class, while the boys would do better in woodworking, though as long as no one stabbed their hand with the electric sewing machine or lost a finger at the mercy of a table saw, the teachers didn't care one way or the other and yelled at us equally when our skills weren't up to par. woodworking came first for me and i actually did quite well, painstakingly cutting the shape of the state of indiana out of a piece of wood and turning it promptly into an IU clock. if you've never seen the state of indiana on a map, or have never had the misfortune to try to cut it out of wood, you should know that it has a lot of little curves and ridges at the bottom and actually makes for a tough pattern when trying to negotiate an electric saw to smoothly form the border. however, i cut out my great state with care and proudly shellacked the hell out of it once it was sanded smooth. bless my parents for hanging it up - though i think it found a home in the seldom used den.
so with great accomplishment i completed my industrial arts project earlier than most of the class. rather than take on another project, i was enlisted by my friend ben to help him with his own indiana-shaped clock. poor thing just couldn't seem to cut out the bottom border with all of its curves. his block of wood looked more like he had hacked at it with a tiny axe than run the blade of the saw around it. so, i stepped in with my newfound woodworking ability and helped him salvage his project. and because of me, my friend ben got a respectable B on his project and told me he owed me. i shrugged it off, thinking that i was now the master of all things industrial art-ish and i wouldn't need to call in that favor. boy, was i wrong.
nine weeks of sewing followed the woodworking class and i found that my sewing skills weren't nearly as quick to emerge as my woodworking skills. in fact, they never actually emerged at all. one of the first things we did was write our names in large script across a sheet of notebook paper and then we had to use the sewing machine to trace our name. granted, i think i got screwed because my name was 6 loooooong letters, but i was determined to do this. at the end of the class, i was sweating and annoyed and my sheet of notebook paper looked like a small animal had chewed its was across it, rather than having my name perfectly punched out across the page like most of my classmates. this gave me cause for alarm. i knew the next 9 weeks would not be nearly as fun as industrial arts. we made potholders, which i managed to muddle through well enough. then came the big dog. it was time to make the pillow. i chose a square pillow in some god-awful royal blue furry material and went to town. i would sew, pick up the material, realize it was crooked, and start over. a useful little tool called the seam ripper became my best friend. i sewed and sewed, watching with panic as my fellow domestic engineers hummed away at their machines, neatly putting together pillows of many sizes, shapes and colors. in choosing to do a square pillow, i also was forced to sew an applique of letters or numbers onto the front, so that the project proved as difficult as those of various shapes that other students had chosen. barely able to sew straight lines to put the pillow together, i had no idea how i was going to be able to get the 9 and 5 (yes, i put my high school graduation year on the pillow) to appear without the use of super glue.
and that's when i remembered that my friend ben owed me a favor. looking to see how he was progressing one day near the end of the 9 weeks, i was amazed to see that not only had he finished his project, but he was also working on an additional small project to while away his time. and so there i went, over to cash in on that favor. sneakily, we managed to finish my pillow with him doing most of the work to apply the numbers to the front and i stuffed the monstrosity with relief. i had barely hand stitched the closing when the deadline hit and projects had to be turned in. somehow i managed to get an A in the class, if for no other reason than my teacher watched me in so much exasperation that maybe she felt sorry for me. as that particular teacher was not known as one to show sympathy, however, i also have to give ben his fair share of credit for my grade.
and so it went - the tennis-playing, cheerleading, girly-girl and the football QB, star wrestler and all-around jock sawed and sewed their way to good grades and respectable projects, managing to break down a few stereotypes in the process.
to this day i can't sew on a button. stitch witchery saves my life (and the hems of my pants) and i'm more than happy to pay my neighborhood cleaners to bail me out of any repair work that any of my clothing needs. could i still cut a chunk of wood into the state of indiana if i had the saw and the materials? like a mo fo.
Mar 15, 2008
Feb 14, 2008
ignorance is bliss
conversation yesterday morning (2/13) with roommate regarding whether or not she should meet up with a guy that night for a drink:
her: "yeah, but he emailed me today and asked if tonight was ok for grabbing a drink. isn't that kind of rushing?"
me: "eh, well, the problem is that you're now close to the weekend and if you put him off and don't want to waste a weekend night on him, you're looking at next week. probably better to just get it over with."
her: "yeah, i know. i don't want to make plans for the weekend and i'm definitely NOT going to go out with him tomorrow night."
me: "no kidding. tomorrow is "LOST" night!"
her: "um, i was talking about the whole valentine's day thing...."
me: oh yeah. that.
clearly vday is not high on my priority list. in fact, the only list it takes any high priority on is my shitlist. if i have to hear that fucking "every kiss begins with k" jingle one more time, i may hurt someone or something (most likely my tv).
happy pointless, overrated, card-company made-up holiday day!
her: "yeah, but he emailed me today and asked if tonight was ok for grabbing a drink. isn't that kind of rushing?"
me: "eh, well, the problem is that you're now close to the weekend and if you put him off and don't want to waste a weekend night on him, you're looking at next week. probably better to just get it over with."
her: "yeah, i know. i don't want to make plans for the weekend and i'm definitely NOT going to go out with him tomorrow night."
me: "no kidding. tomorrow is "LOST" night!"
her: "um, i was talking about the whole valentine's day thing...."
me: oh yeah. that.
clearly vday is not high on my priority list. in fact, the only list it takes any high priority on is my shitlist. if i have to hear that fucking "every kiss begins with k" jingle one more time, i may hurt someone or something (most likely my tv).
happy pointless, overrated, card-company made-up holiday day!
Dec 22, 2007
reason #536 why i'm single....
this morning my 20-month-old niece rubbed the part of my leg exposed by a gap between my sock and pj pants and said "awwwww" just like she does when she pets her cat. clearly, it's time to shave the legs.
Dec 9, 2007
do you see what i see?
take a look at the picture below and tell me what it looks like.....
go ahead.... what do you think that resembles? come on, just say it. you know you want to....
you're right! it looks like a vagina! why, you ask, do i have a picture of a frilly vagina on my blog? because this is apparently the newest option in purses. that's right - this thing is a bag in which you can store your keys, phone, wallet, tampons (appropriate, eh?) and other items. what i would like to know is, who the hell would purchase this thing - at a price of $195, no less! - and actually carry it around?
i can just picture it now.....
girl walks into a bar. boy sees girl and comes over to chat. "my, what a nice vagina you have handing on your arm!" girl smiles. "why, thank you! and it's really roomy in there! much bigger than it looks from the outside!" boy and girl chat and drink, boy hopes he gets to go home with girl and see her real vagina.
seriously, who wants to carry a vagina purse?!! if they weren't so ridiculously expensive, i might actually be tempted to get one and carry it around with me just to see the reactions i would get from people.
the velvet vulva offers a variety of vagina-esque purses and bags that represent "the sacred portal to the feminine temple." don't want a shoulder bag? the velvet vulva offers the pocket vulva, a smaller version which folds into a "modest" state and is small enough to carry as a clutch. want something special for your wedding day? don't worry - there is also a line of nuptual vulvas designed for your big day. and if purses and clutches aren't your thing, you can still own your own velvet vulva miniature - a framed fabric vagina that hangs on your wall.
vulvas range from approximately $100 - $350. for that amount of money i'll go buy myself a kate spade and leave my vagina where it belongs - fully covered without a wallet or keychain tucked away inside.
Nov 12, 2007
husband for hire
well ladies, here it is. the ultimate proof (as if we needed it!) that we no longer need to pine away for that elusive husband. i mean, really, what do we need husbands for anyway? to fix things? to kill bugs? to do the plumbing and handywork? rest assured. if you are single, female and not DIY inclined, there is a solution without visiting the altar. this flyer was actually found outside my building and is, apparently, a legitimate business. that's right - we can now pay for the services of a husband without having to actually marry one. so go ahead - pick up hotties to service your, ahem, needs, and pay for this guy to service your home. you get what you need in both departments. of course, i wouldn't stoop to paying a man for these services - that's why i rent for god's sake, so i don't have to do any fixing or home improving on my own - but if you find yourself in a pinch and need your windows sealed, basement leak-proofed or your drywall patched, you can call this guy and he'll rush right over and perform such husbandly duties as these and a whole lot more. (no, dirties, not that!)
so here we are, single and fabulous and with the option to pay up for - let's face it - the duties we'd typically have to scream and nag and yell to have done by our signif other. is this a step ahead for single womankind or an insult to our abilities to do such tasks on our own? you tell me....
Nov 5, 2007
tag! you're it!
i've just been tagged for the first time in the blogging world. my sis just sent me this meme, so here are 6 little things about me...
List one fact, word or tidbit that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your first or middle name. You can theme it to your blog or make it general. Then tag one person for each letter of your name.
A - auntie of one
N - nocturnally inclined
D - direction impaired
R - relationship challenged
E - euchre enthusiast
A - alcohol aficionada
because the noble savage tagged 3 of the few people i know who have blogs, i can only tag a couple instead of the 6 i should be tagging for the number of letters in my name. so, here ya go rachel, gretchen and casi. tag, you're it!
List one fact, word or tidbit that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your first or middle name. You can theme it to your blog or make it general. Then tag one person for each letter of your name.
A - auntie of one
N - nocturnally inclined
D - direction impaired
R - relationship challenged
E - euchre enthusiast
A - alcohol aficionada
because the noble savage tagged 3 of the few people i know who have blogs, i can only tag a couple instead of the 6 i should be tagging for the number of letters in my name. so, here ya go rachel, gretchen and casi. tag, you're it!
Nov 1, 2007
redrum! redrum!
so i finally did it. i watched "the shining." i know to some it may sound trivial, but i have been trying to watch this movie for a good 3 years and haven't managed to do so until this evening. for some reason (probably because everything i've heard from those who have seen it say the movie is creepy as hell) i've been holding out on watching this particular film. it has been my personal demon to watch this movie alone. i think i was simply waiting to have someone to watch it with. a friend would have been great, a hot guy i could cling to during the many scary parts would have been excellent. in absentia of both, i decided to suck it up, sit down with a bottle of wine, give myself a french manicure and watch. jack nicholson would cringe if he realized someone was french manicuring their nails during his horror flick, but oh well.
having just watched it in non-weenie fashion - home alone with all but one dim, little light off and phone put away on silent - i'm quite glad i watched it by myself. i mean, after watching this movie, who the fuck would want to go to bed with their signif other, for fear that you awake in the middle of the night to an impersonation of jack's "heeeeeere's johnny!" or the fear that your honey has gone crazy and now wants to kill you? no thank you. i'm quite happy going to bed on my own, in my locked apartment, feeling warm and fuzzy from my bottle of red and looking forward to passing out cold, void of all nightmares involving my boyfriend slaying me with an axe in the middle of the night.
happy halloween kids. i guess this is the time of year for facing all of those demons, even the ones that make you realize you can do lots of things on your own - even if it's as trivial as having scary movie night with self.
having just watched it in non-weenie fashion - home alone with all but one dim, little light off and phone put away on silent - i'm quite glad i watched it by myself. i mean, after watching this movie, who the fuck would want to go to bed with their signif other, for fear that you awake in the middle of the night to an impersonation of jack's "heeeeeere's johnny!" or the fear that your honey has gone crazy and now wants to kill you? no thank you. i'm quite happy going to bed on my own, in my locked apartment, feeling warm and fuzzy from my bottle of red and looking forward to passing out cold, void of all nightmares involving my boyfriend slaying me with an axe in the middle of the night.
happy halloween kids. i guess this is the time of year for facing all of those demons, even the ones that make you realize you can do lots of things on your own - even if it's as trivial as having scary movie night with self.
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